Deal breakers vs healthy compromise

[yikesss]

What are some of your deal breakers? Or icks/red flags? How can you tell the difference between them just not being the one and you needing to compromise on things? Any tips for finding the balance between wanting a perfect relationship and ..reality?? 😆

There’s no such thing as a perfect relationship
attitudes to money, where you’ll live and childcare / partnering as you bring up kids - these are big things which need to be talked about and decided on
Also never expect anyone to significantly change - if they’re a lazy arse who doesn’t do housework / does drugs : gambling : addictive a LTR or marriage won’t change that

My non-negotiables are: complete honesty, open and continuous communication, accountability, financial stability, division of domestic labour. Everything else can be tinkered with around the edges.
And I agree with PP, people don't change. And if they do, they need to have done the work and enter my life as a complete person. I am not interested in "potential" or being a rehabilitation center for broken men.

But I am older, no biological clock concerns and am free to set my bar as high as I feel like.

A cheerful disposition, ability to compromise, and a good, open communicator are my must-haves in friendships and relationships. I don’t have the time or patience to deal with mood swings, negative outlooks, always finding something to moan about, or people who can’t say what they mean and mean what they say so it’s a constant battle of trying to work out what’s going on. Also, independence and confidence: I’m not interested in people who need constant reassurance or can’t be accountable to themselves and others.