Caught partner smoking at the back door

[Hayxx]

So today I came home and found out my partner has been smoking at the back door, he sits in the living room with the patio doors open. We had agreed this would not happen I am so against smoking since having children, we have a newborn and a toddler, it's not like the back door is in the kitchen it's in the lounge where we spend most of our time. I am so angry and paranoid smoke is going into all the furniture and toys etc. he's trying to justify it with having the doors wide open and sitting at the door but I know full well smoke will still be coming in. It's infuriated me to the point I want to leave.

Am I in the right here? Or am I being over the top?

It's on his clothes, his hands, his hair. If he cares about his kids he needs to quit.

How can you bare to kiss him? Gross. I couldn't live with a smoker. I certainly would never tolerate someone smoking in my children's house! IMO he needs to quit or he needs to leave. So disrespectful and disgusting.

Your reaction is a bit OTT. He needs to work on quitting and cutting down, sure, just ask him to stand further away from the house in the meantime.

i agree

He needs to stand outside with all doors shut at the least. Smoking inside with doors open is not enough.

You had 2 children with an addict.

He'll have smoke on his skin and hair etc anyway, unless he showers every single time he has a fag?

I'd be more worried about the awful stink than any 3rd hand residue around the home.

It,'s the pure selfishness of smokers that is so upsetting.
It's one thing damaging your own health and killing yourself but it's quite another damaging the health and killing other people.
And your H is particularly selfish because he is prepared to damage the health of his young children.
Even if he smokes further away from the house the dangerous chemicals from the cigarette smoke are on his clothes, and his hands and body. And these will be transferred to his children, and to OP , and to what ever he touches.

Smoking away from the house is the bare minimum he should do.

I don't quite understand - you're against smoking but he is a smoker, right? So you know he smokes and you made an agreement that he should not smoke in particular places?

I remember reading a while back, that smokers should go completely outside (front or back) and away from the house, as well as closing any windows and doors, as the smoke will travel in via openings and cracks and spread from room to room. 🚬
So I had a little google and AI had this to say....

Cigarette smoke can travel far, spreading up to 20 feet outdoors and lingering for hours indoors. A minimum outdoor distance of at least 9 meters (about 30 feet) is needed to avoid most exposure, but downwind smoke can travel further. Indoors, smoke spreads through cracks, doorways, and ventilation systems and can remain in the air for up to 5 hours.

Make him.go outside and keep a brolly handy by the door.

This
Calm down OP

I’d go ape shit. Cigarette smoke repulses me and the butts makes me heave. I literally cannot stand it.