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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think friend's wife is mean

8 replies

DoubleEspressoForMe · 23/07/2025 19:52

We are part of quite large friendship group in their late 30s who have known each other for years, with wives and husbands added in over the years. I socialise with this wife but I've always found her a bit prickly and hard to get very close to. They have young children, and recently we met up as girls and she started talking about how she was done with having sex, that she'd made her husband (my friend) have a vasectomy, but didn't need him any more because she had a great toy that was waaaay better anyway. She makes him sleep in the other room. Some of it a think (hope) is meant in a jokey way.... although she's not really a very jokey person so maybe I'm just hoping thats the case. From conversations the friend had with other members of the group, he's very lonely and miserable so this makes me think at least some of what she's said may well not be a joke. Obviously I have no idea as to the workings of their marriage behind closed doors, but all this just struck me as really unkind to say in front of his friends for a start, but the whole situation is pretty cruel to him as well. Am I being unreasonable to think this and a but baffled by the whole conversation!?

OP posts:
Jellybean23 · 23/07/2025 20:02

Time to tell her that it’s very personal stuff she’s sharing but you’d rather not hear it thanks.

User37482 · 23/07/2025 20:11

Yeah it’s mean to share this with his friends, should have kept it for her own friends tbh.

MrsTerryPratchett · 23/07/2025 20:25

She maybe thinks you are friends. Female friends. Not that she’s a ‘wife’ who is added politely but always less a part of the group than her DH. All fine but I can see why she’s saying ‘girls’ night’ things when it’s actually not that.

CuppaTeaBab · 11/03/2026 20:38

She was trying to embarrass him....to his friends. She showed her colours. I would be checking in on my friend more often.

Birdh0use · 11/03/2026 22:25

Just ignore and don't repeat

Createausername1970 · 11/03/2026 22:26

Zombie thread.

amber763 · 02/04/2026 13:14

Deleted. Didn't realise zombie

LaurieFairyCake · 02/04/2026 13:25

if she said it in front of his friends that’s contempt and the marriage is over apart from the paperwork

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