Am i wrong?

[AmberOtter]

Sooo basically my DH has found very innocent work related messages on my phone today from a male work colleague- talking about work stuff etc- all 100% innocent. My DH has gone ballistic, calling me all the names under the sun, a cheat and insulting the way i look.

He is of the thought process that men and woman can’t be friends as it always leads to something!! Obviously I disagree and will be getting my ducks in a row as this is the final straw- some things can’t be unsaid- but wondered what others thought about this?

OP if you inform work will you be putting yourself in bother if any of the messages between you and your colleague had any confidential info about your clients? Would it be better to just inform your colleague directly so hes aware on his guard if your STBEXH does turn up? How likely is that? Most bullies like him are all talk and unlikely to actually turn up to confront a man....

@LurkyMcLurkinson yes, unfortunately you are right. Not so much the isolation but I rarely wear make up or perfume anymore because of past comments. I also have long thick hair which takes ages to wash and dry so that always prompts comments like ‘why does it take so long for you to get ready for work’ ‘getting ready for someone etc etc. And it is emotional abuse 100%, i’ve known this for a while but have tried to brush off other ‘comments’ but the cancer comment is the last straw!

They’re always the same sadly. Definitely reach out to a charity for support leaving. The risk to you will increase as he will assume you’re leaving for someone else as he couldn’t possibly acknowledge he’s an abusive piece of shit.

Yep, definitely abuse. I’m sorry you’re going through this, especially while ill. Do you have any friends or family who can support you?

I only have my mum family wise and she will worry about me and the DC’s if i tell her so really don’t want to do that. I’ve got friends though who are supportive.