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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Friend Being Stalked Advice Please

9 replies

TheCoralMoose · 20/06/2025 03:22

A friend who i went to uni with got divorced 3 years ago and was healthy and happy until recently.

She was a member of a psychic night monthly held at a neighbourhood club.

She went for the first 4 months then all hell broke loose.

A man 17 years her senior whom she showed no interest in apart from the odd polite chat had been pestering her to go on a date.
She told him not interested and thats when it started.

He approached her next door neighbour when she was at work and told them she was a paedophile. My friends neighbour didnt believe it but told my friend and gave a description of him neighbour has CCTV and kept footage.
He contacted the university she works for and told them she is taking drugs, she got called in because of this. She would would never do anything illegal.

Police were involved after my friend made a statement.
He was asked to attend a voluntary interview the psychic night manager has his mobile number like the other members in case it gets cancelled etc this was given to the police.

He said she was making it up but friends neighbour gave the police a statement and the cctv images plus her manager at work the investigating officer decided there was enough on him and advised him to except a caution or go to court he took the caution and was told not to contact my friend and stay away from her property.

Just over three months passed. My friend was going to work and bumped into him he is a bus driver he was waiting to get on a bus to drive it after the other driver was ending their shift and he warned her not to grass on him again he will have her house burned down by the drug dealers he knows.

He has asked his employers if he can do the university bus route he is doing it on purpose.
She reported him again this time he was arrested at his home address.

He is a drug user known to the police he was cautioned again.

A fortnight later her neighbour saw someone set fire to one of her wheelie bins and try to put it under her kitchen window. The neighbour called emergency services they came and took statements and cctv footage.
It was a man who is a friend of this fucking clown and a dealer.
He was arrested again and his mate too.
It is going to trial he has been charged but he is saying he is being fitted up.

My friend owns the house only bought it 11 months ago.
The fucking evil twat started renting a flat a few minutes walk away 3 months ago.

Will he be made to move away?.

OP posts:
PoopingAllTheWay · 20/06/2025 03:25

She needs a restraining order on him and fast

TheCoralMoose · 20/06/2025 03:29

PoopingAllTheWay · 20/06/2025 03:25

She needs a restraining order on him and fast

The police have one on him already.

OP posts:
Lindajonesjustcantlivemylife · 20/06/2025 03:32

If he's a drug user I would have thought bus company would have him tested and fired .if he's a known user to the police he's got a criminal record for drugs I'm surprised he got employed as a bus driver.

FOJN · 20/06/2025 06:35

I was going to post a link to the National Stalking Helpline but I see a PP has already done it. Your friend needs to contact them to get advice about how to proceed and what she needs to do to make sure the police take it very seriously. Cautions have clearly not helped, a more serious sanction or deterrent needs to be in place.

Your friend could move but if the stalker ever finds out her new address it will start all over again.

HoskinsChoice · 20/06/2025 07:16

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sandrapinchedmysandwich · 20/06/2025 07:29

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Read the room ffs. There is a time and a place for humour. This isn't it. What is wrong with you?

FOJN · 20/06/2025 07:50

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FFS OP"s friend is being stalked. There are plenty of documentaries which include personal accounts of being a victim of this crime, please go and watch a few. It's horrific, it's terrorism on an individual level.

An associate of the stalker tried to burn the OP's friends house down, surely it's obvious that is no laughing matter.

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