Lost photos my fault really?

[justasking111]

Lost photos my fault really? In 1990 my FIL died the children and their wives were sent to clear out the house. I opened a bin to find my MIL had binned every photograph going back to the early century. I said nothing but rescued them. In 2001 while pregnant I ordered 10 albums and sorted them putting them in albums to the best of my ability.

Fast forward to 2025 my son wants to do something with them. My husband going nuts insisting that I've binned xyz pictures. Well I bloody haven't and now wish I'd left them in that bin in 1990.

Am I being unreasonable to have done my best when at the time husbands family didn't give a toss.

Why is your husband angry?

I don’t understand. You produced the ones that were in the bin and your dh is claiming that you didn’t retrieve them all - there are some missing?
Very odd

Sorry are you saying the albums have been lost now after being put into and that is why your husband is angry?

Or is he angry that they were not in the bin?

Can you explain more detail?

Because suddenly it's my bloody fault that pictures he swears existed going back decades I have binned. All I did was rescue, stuff into albums. I don't know these people from the early and mid 20th century I wasn't born and didn't live in this part of the world.

This. I was on maternity leave a decade later so ordered a dozen albums and tried to sort. Imagine photos developed by relatives of my husband as amateurs, very small black and white pics pre, during and after WW2.

So if you have the albums of photos, what photos does he think are binned?

So are there some missing, is that the problem?

He sounds like a horrible man.

What a great memory he has is he remembers every photo from before 1990!

Why won’t he accept that you rescued the photos from being binned and here they all are in the albums that you took the time to purchase and fill?

Seems rather odd

So he's angry with you because you weren't able to rescue all of them, is that right? He sounds like a bit of a knob.

So you rescued a whole lot of photos. He remembers photos that he can’t locate in your haul so he’s is now blaming you?

Tell him he can enjoy all the ones he rescues and that you and DS will enjoy the ones you rescued.

Or, if he’s actually a decent human being most of the time, try and work out who and what he’s actually angry about.

Did he not realise MiL tried to bin all the photos? Is he actually not related to the people in the photos so is triggered by them being saved? That’s a stretch, obviously.

I can’t make head nor tail of this.

why does he think you have binned pictures if you sorted them into albums?

So he’s looked through the albums and there are some missing according to what he remembers there being and he is suggesting you have binned those ones? Is that right?

Yes

Presumably he knows his mother binned photos and you rescued them?
Can he not work out that perhaps she binned the photos he is remembering and no one saw, so no one rescued them?

I don't know spent the evening going through a few albums which was nostalgic but no sign of the ones he wants yet.

Yes, this. This is very likely what happened to the photos - his mother had already binned those ones in 1990, either no one realised at the time and/or no one gave a shit and just let them go, and they were long gone by the time OP found and rescued the others. Alternatively, maybe the ones he's thinking of had ended up with other relatives at some point before his mother even binned the ones that were rescued? Whoever's fault it was, it's not OP's.