Would you be annoyed if a relative bought a house 3 doors down from you without telling you?

[Housequery1]

That’s it really, you bought anew house and a few months later a relative buys a house a few doors down, without saying a word. Would you be annoyed? Or would it even bother you?

So you're the relative who's just moved in then OP?

I would be annoyed they didn't tell me and I do think that's strange, unless it's a distant relative you don't have much contact with?
But if it's a relative I loved I would not be upset that they had moved a few doors down, could even be nice, Unless they are always interfering.

Not the purpose of the thread but don't you get the decision in principle on the mortgage before viewing properties, or is that something that's gone out the window since I last bought?

In your situation I would mention I was buying the house after exchange. Sales can still fall through at that stage but less likely to than before exchange. And I'd only mention it as a heads up for a relative that I liked OK. You really don't see people often even if they live really close, unless you have something in common like school run to the same school.

I live about 15 minutes walk from my sister's house, so quite a few roads away but still near, we both really like it and I wouldn't mind if it was much closer. But my NDN has your situation with an aunt she's fallen out with four doors down. They just ignore each other's existence and I don't think they even bump into each other randomly in the Co-op.

So if it’s a new build that makes it a bit different as it’s not an established area yet

i’d let them know that you’re looking there and waiting on the mortgage offer and see what they say. If you get on okay and won’t be popping in endlessly annoying each other (unless this would be fun for you both) then all good.

fwiw I wouldn’t give a shit if any of my family moved in nearby, at least I’d be sure they wouldn’t be nightmare neighbours - but I appreciate I’m lucky in respect to that

Agree. They must be a bit strange anyway if they have done this without telling you so boundaries are very important .

I haven’t moved in yet, I have put a deposit on the house. And I am currently waiting for my mortgage offer.

Yeah, we did it the other way around 🤣 we love the house. So we put down a deposit and then went to the bank. We are in a pretty good position so we don’t think there will be any issues, but as we all know sometimes things don’t go to plan. Currently, just waiting for the bank. They have most of our paperwork. So here’s hoping it will be approved.

I would look on the plus side, reliable neighbour I could trust close by that could keep an eye on my house when I go on holiday. Someone I could ask to pop into feed my cats if I had an overnight trip.

Your relationship with that family member might naturally get a little closer, particularly if you have children around the same age as they could play together. Also 4 doors away is close enough without being too close but ideally a street or 2 away would be better.

I would definitely mention at this stage though to the relative so they are not completely shocked when you move in.

This happened to me , my relatives. Lived at 17 a small house they made an offer on 11 a big house We were about to spend lots and lots of money on an extension . Got so mad ,cancelled our plans and bought the big house instead , live at 11 now it’s a better position , Best decision. Never regretted it . However Ruined the relationship . Never spoke again . Don’t care . My relatives are weird.

I think it would be nice to say I'm/we are thinking about buying a house a few doors away from you, depends on how things turn out, they are nice houses arnt they? That way, your letting them know but not saying it's 100% going to happen.

You mean you out-bid them??? I think that's hilarious!!!

I wouldn’t give a shiny shit. I think it’s entirely fucking odd that PO’s are saying they would be ‘horrified’. Jesus, dramatic much.

OP you don’t have to inform anyone where you’re buying a house and I’d wonder what sort of weirdos they were if they had a whine about it.

As it is more distant relative, aunt/cousin, no it wouldn’t bother me.

it would bother me if it were mother, mil, sister/brother or BIL/sil -someone I’d be talking to regularly that would actually be considered hiding the move from me as opposed to the more distant relative whose life I’m not really that involved in.

Big difference because one is hiding (lying by omission) whereas the other, it’s not my business and my life isn’t their business.

I'd love it, but it's extremely weird they didn't tell you! It's so weird, are you sure they know you live there??!!

Sorry, caught up on messages, it's you who's the buyer!

Super weird! Just say we've put an offer in, we're excited and you'll let them know if you get it.

I did this I bought a house 11 houses from my favourite aunt and uncle. I told them when we had been accepted as the buyers. They were excited for us and I saw more of the relatives that visited them and they came to my house for Sunday dinner with my Nan (her mum) and my mum, her sister. . It was wonderful I cried when they sold up and moved to Weymouth for health benefits. They eventually came back and went to a three bed and then moved to a bungalow. Both times within a few minutes walking distance from me. They've both died, I miss them so much.

I’d assume a relative would tell me they’d put an offer in then keep me updated… surely if you’re related it would just be polite?! I mean you’re going to bump in to each other!

Oh you’re the buyer!
I would have told them I was looking at it tbh! Why wouldn’t you?!

Nope wouldn't bother me in the slightest. Both my parents live within 3 streets of me my sister lives the next street.
But even of it was next door I wouldn't care

Wouldn't bother me at all, my whole family moved out of London to be closer to me, I really liked it, spontaneous friday night partiesj. Big birthday parties family Sunday lunches Babysitters, all the kids together. Some of my best memories.

This is so odd. I'd be delighted unless it was somebody I really disliked - and even then I wouldn't care.

Oh you're the buyer! No, I'd love it.

OP, I think it is your business to do this.
However, as family I would start as you mean to go and do not call to their house at all, ever, without a specific invite.

I also would make a point of not mentioning them or any business of theirs you might see because you live so sclose.

I haven't more than nodded/waved politely to my neighbours of 25 years.

It can be done. It definitely is the norm in my ver urban setting.

Being super respectful of their space and privacy means you can't go wrong IMO.

Fingers crossed @Housequery1 - hope it all works out for you! It's a stressful process at the best of times...

You say they bought a house 3 doors down 2mths after you.
It takes a lot longer than 2 mths to buy a house, sounda like you were both looking at the same time, and if both of you are familiar with and raised in the area its not that surprising.