How often do you have sex post children

[Alisaann]

Hi ,
im just curious, had a girly night with some mum friends I’ve made through children’s school .. few wines in and we got into the subject of ‘sex’ ! One of the girls ask how often we had sex since our children have been born ! I have 10 and 7 year old . I said coupe of times a week mostly but can be less or occasionally more . There was a mix response with majority saying it’s 4-5 times a week . Other said hardly ever and one saying they haven't done it for months . I’m just wondering how often everyone else did it . I know every relationship different. My husband would do it every night given the chance 🤦🏼‍♀️😜
Lisa

My husband wants it every day...me less so

4-5 times a week? I hope they know how lucky they are!

Haha same !! It definitely changes when you have kids .

I know 🤣 I was abit sceptical on this ! One has 4 children and a full time job !! Plus she’s at the gym 4/5 times a week she’s a machine

Hardly ever. Teens always in the house. Dh and I are old and always shattered.

This is the age I’m dreading .. it’s easy when they are young mine go to bed 7:30
every night ( very early risers ) they need there sleep . So we have plenty of time in the being to ourselves .

I never understand why quantity matters? Surely it’s the quality of the relationship that’s important?

The 5 times a week woman might be doing it out of duty to some oversexed dullard lump of a husband and might be in the gym expunging whatever self hatred arises from it. The woman who hasn’t had it in months might have a really hands on partner who is equally knackered and prioritises their family life and they really love each other despite the lack of sex.

You just can’t know the real picture behind closed doors.

Yep it’s much easier when they’re little. And also easier if you have older teens who go out a lot. We have neither. We have a 13 year old who is living his best life chatting with his friends from school whilst on the Xbox all the time, and a 21 year old who’s home from university a lot of the time and doesn’t have friends locally so doesn’t go out. They both stay up till 10.30 at the earliest; when I am absolutely shattered myself and want to sleep. It’s a killer. We steal odd moments on days off etc. Neither of us that bothered though, genuinely just happy and accept that’s how it is at the moment (married 15 years).

I've had sex once since 2023

You make a good point ! Yeah it is the quality of the relationship that matters most .

Managed it twice last week! Usually once. Would like more but we’re busy and tired. Self employed and try to “do it” during school hours.

Now they are older and always awake later than us it's less than it used to be when they were little. I dream of a much bigger house for this reason where our bedroom has an ensuite and walk in wardrobe at the side rather than their bedrooms! We have to take moments when the house is empty or first thing in the morning or middle of the night. It doesn't happen at bed time anymore.. At least once a week now but would both prefer it more.

We don't really have an average.

DS (13) and DD (6) live with us and we have DSS (9) with us in the holidays.

Sometimes we have it every day, other times we can go a few weeks without it. The longest we went without was about 5 weeks, but I was recovering from gallbladder surgery. We just had plenty of cuddles instead.

Rarely. One year old who doesn’t sleep, four year old, full time jobs. I’m always knackered or ill. Hoping things improve as the kids get older!

Lucky them..last time was when my daughter was conceived 8 Years... Though I'm a single parent so not through choice