What’s worse?

[JKDcot]

removed

I think there is nothing at all to be gained from a post like this.

That's a thought experiment nobody needs to conduct.

You support them as individuals, and do not compare what they are struggling with.

What do you have to gain from the opinions of strangers as to which vague scenario is “harder”?

Why would you even ask this. They are both obviously finding it hard so just support them however you can if they need it. It’s not a competition

Each one is as hard as the person going through it is finding it