I know it's a cliché....but AIBU the loo seat down?

[BluePencilCase]

I actually don't mention it that much to DH, and he leaves it up every time now. I say it to him jokingly and he laughs

Tonight I said "pls darling can you try to put it down sometimes".

He said "well, shall I just tell you everytime I have to pick up your shoes etc"

And I said "sure if I'm leaving my shoes somewhere and it's annoying, tell me, but it's not really a response to my request about the loo seat"

Then he said "I have to stand up to pee so there is no logical reason why I should have to put it down. How about this...you should bloody put it up when you're done" and then ge basically told me to shut up.

I mean, I don't know why men are expected to put it down but it's fairly common decency no? I didny mention it much to this point as knew he'd be snappy and shitty but god sake. Tell me if I'm going mad here. Or is it just not a thing anymore and I should put a sock in it?

Does he leave it up when he flushes?? I hope he flushes!
You are supposed to put the lid down before you flush, so his logic makes no sense. Unless he’s spraying the bathroom with his flush…

So glad all the men in my family sit on the loo, so a raised loo seat is never an issue!

It used to annoy me, but after years of teenage boys and now having my very elderly father living with me...leaving the seat up is infinitely preferable to just pissing all over it!

You should always put the lid down to flush so he should be doing that anyway. Disgusting to flush with the lid up, pee particles everywhere

I am going to assume he flushes then the seat goes down. Otherwise he is standing in a lovely urine shower at every flush.

So if he flushes, and doesnt put the seat or lid down, get a uv light and show him all his piss and worse that is all over the surrounding tiles and floor. Boke.
different problem if he doesnt even flush

Surprisingly, whether the lid is up or down doesn't make a huge difference.

I didn't even really think of that. He flushes of course but you're right he must be flushing with the loo seat up. He's in and out in 2 seconds. I'm not going to bring it up again. He's really pissed off at the whole thing (pun intended)

I'd never heard that about putting the seat down to flush.

Or is it the lid?

Either way, I can't imagine any amount of nagging, even with UV lights, persuading any men or boys I know to do it. :(

If it's just about courtesy, it makes no sense to me, as why not leave it up for him, then?

This, plus also he doesn't shit standing up presumably?

You are always sitting, he is sometimes standing, sometimes sitting, so there's no logic to suggesting it should always be left up.

I've a DH and have raised three sons, so am heavily outnumbered. I solve the loo seat problem by mainly using my ensuite, which is pretty much exclusively used by me so the seat remains down. I occasionally find the downstairs loo seat up, but I'm related to the men who use it so I cope.

At work, however, the toilets nearest my office have been made unisex. Which means I often have to put down a loo seat that has been left up by a man I'm not related to - now that I really don't like.

As for putting the loo seat down before flushing, nobody in my house does that. If I come across a loo seat that's down I get very suspicious about what I might find in there when I lift the lid... especially at work.

I don't like the loo seat (or lid) left up because it looks messy and shows that it was up during flushing. It's polite to put it down. But I'd be more bothered about your DH reaction to you asking him about it, which was quite rude.

Seat down, here.

I persuaded dh to always put the seat down. After all, he sits as well as stands, so he also benefits.

Dh taught our boys to pee sitting down at night. Less mess and less noise. And, on the subject of less mess, he also taught them to wipe up any drips they make. I didn't ask him to do any of this. He seemed to think it reasonable that he take the rest of the family's comfort and convenience into consideration.

Even without the flushing argument - whilst men stand to pee they sit to poo - so not 100% seat up - and 100% of ops are sat down - so as a balance the seat is needed down more than 50% and therefore down should be the default.

We have a loo each so I don't worry about the boys' loos and they leave mine alone - bliss.