Neighbourhood whatsapp

[WiNdoOpEn]

Shame!

I’ve just been outed for having sex with the window open, the shame! Not a PM/ text/ written note but a “can WiNdOOpEN at no.69 please keep it down” in the street WhatsApp, shall I list the house tonight!? I’ve primed a baseball cap and shades.

help me live the shame

Was it worth it though?

oh Christ I’d be gone

Sell the house, move in the dead of night, it’s the only way 😂

Style it out. Red lipstick tomorrow, hair looking windswept, whistful smile like your mind is somewhere else entirely, slightly smug demeanour. 😂 It's the only way

Seriously?! 😂. Fucking own it. How dare they try to shame you.

I'd call them out on it. Unless it's a regular occurrence and you really are pissing the neighbourhood off!

I assume 2 people were involved, so perhaps not aimed at you, or does your partner orgasm quietly?

lol my reply would be “jealous much”

Why does saying 'can you keep it down' infer you were having sex ?
It's vague and could have meant anything.

To other people in the chat I mean.

Just reply
”oh gosh we are away on holiday at moment, back tomorrow. Will pass the message onto the house sitter apologies”

Unless they also happened to be dueting islands in the stream as they did they deed, I would assume op knows what noise complaint to which the neighbour is referring.

Do you really live at Number 69? 🤣

@Anotherparkingthread yes she knows and the person that heard probably does but nobody else on the chat would.

You have to be brazen about it. Just message back 'oops, sorry!!' and be done with it.

Just on the off chance this isn't a load of bollocks perhaps try shutting your windows? How loud are you that people down the street can hear you?
Try keeping your performative orgasm to yourself, life isn't a cheap porno film!

Half your luck:::

Sorry, not sorry.

Have you got teenagers? Can you blame them?

Seriously though, just play it cool and a little smug.

I think you need to wear it, double down with increasingly bizzare noises as a distraction - hire a petting zoo, full volume chairman Mao speeches, dentist drill sounds - and strobe lighting

Not everyone's neighbours are down the street! We live mid-terrace. We are surrounded from every side. Someone sneezes and about 3 different neighbours shout bless you!!! We've certainly heard some things we wish we hadn't 🤣🙈

You go, girl.

How loud were you both?
How do they know you are not watching a movie? Did they actually see you?
Your house number is 69?