WTF is it with people and “cuddling” new born babies.

[CoffeeNeededorWine]

I’ll start by saying most people annoy me. People in general are annoying. I know I sound so welcoming 😂

But honestly, what is it with family wanting cuddles with the baby. Seriously, Fu*k off. I’ve just squeezed a melon out, my boobs are leaking, I can hardly sit down and let’s not even start on when I need a poo! But at least I now get to hold and feed my baby. Oh wait visitor number 746764 wants to “cuddle” or feed her. Firstly, it’s not cuddling your holding her and secondly go home while I enjoy my baby for a bit.

Seriously, hoisting people is a chore normally but when you’ve just had a baby. Give me a break. Go cuddle a dog or something and leave us the F alone.

And no, I don’t think having to converse with other people, while sleep deprived is needed. As “family just want a cuddle” I want some piece and to relax. You’re going home to a good night sleep I’m on feed 765. Don’t even get me started on family who think they know best when baby cries and won’t give her back.
Edited by MNHQ

My mum was recovering from stage 3 breast cancer when DD was born it made me and her unbelievably happy for her to give DD a cuddle. The pic I have with her with DD when she was a day old is literally my favourite ever.

But I do understand as a new mum it's instinctive to be protective of a newborn

Cos she wants presents!

I’m sure you’d have something to say if no one paid attention to you baby and didn’t want to visit them.

One day you may not have family or friends or anyone wanting to ' cuddle the baby '
Be grateful you have people who care .

YABU. Babies make people happy and the world’s shit mostly. Chill the F Out

The only time I ever got annoyed with visitors was when they turned up unannounced, at least ask. But other than that, fire away

Oooh MNHQ have edited out the 'Karen'

Oh gosh, I’m really sorry to hear that. 😢 I am glad you managed to get your picture.

I really hope my post never upset you. I’m sleep deprived, insecure and fed up of everyone telling me I am doing it wrong especially my MIL.

Ignoring the Karen BS, I do remember being really overwhelmed with everyone wanting to hold my newborn with my first baby.

All the fuss doesn’t last. Most people will lose interest soon enough!

Amazed anybody actually wants to visit you / your kid anyway.

I personally loved having visitors, they reminded me that I was an adult capable of having conversations and having a life outside of the four walls I was now trapped in being milked like a cow. They also reminded me that I'd get through this hard time, they all did.

Trust me, in a few months time when your baby isn't brand new any more but it's just as hard but you're not news anymore, you'll be begging for someone to come hold the baby so you can pee on your own for two seconds.

As a fellow introvert I get how exhausting people can be. They take a lot of effort and energy that you just don’t have right now. If everyone’s had their first cuddles, could you take a ‘holiday’ of say two weeks where it’s just you, baby and dad? No visitors for that time.

I have never understood why people call holding a baby a "cuddle". You're holding a baby and hoping it doesn't cry. Yes babies are special but 5 minutes is more than enough.

I can empathise as I get the feeling the cuddling you’re referring to has not been the normal pleasant show of affection that most people experience from family/friends. I say this as someone who had PIL rocking up everyday to hold LO for up to four hours at a time and not handing back for feeds so I feel this to my core.

I’m hosting because I know it’s the right thing to do for family as it means so much to them. I’m just exhausted and fed up of being told I’m doing things wrong. When here I just let everyone hold her and feed her as much as they want. Smile and be nice when really I’m thinking my boobs are burning, I’m constipated and would love a nap on the couch all cuddled up.

I no, know one agrees with my post but it’s my thoughts and I stand by them.

I do feel awful for any posters who have lost family. I hadn’t thought of that, I’m genuinely sorry if I upset them.

I just wanted a rant.

Aren't you a ray of sunshine 😬

I loved having people over but I’m very lucky as everyone was extremely respectful, didn’t stay for hours and actually helped around the house as well. I was never expected to ‘host’ or dress up. I can see how it could be really annoying having to host.

I remember DPs aunt making weird clicking noises at my newborn thinking that this was somehow normal. The baby just cried and cried until I managed to wrestle her back from weird aunt.

Agree with PP that it doesn't last for long and novelty wears off quickly, so the hoards of people will stop visiting soon.

But I would say try to see some positives in it. My first was a lockdown baby. It felt so wrong that none of my family could cuddle my baby, and boy would I have loved someone to just hold and soothe her for 15 mins so I could take a breath.

No-one could hold my baby because he was born in lockdown and let me tell you that’s a hell of a lot worse than having to share them occasionally. No sympathy for you. Quick visit, quick cuddle, then make your excuses for them to leave - everyone happy.

Don’t go complaining when people gradually stop getting in touch and visiting or if they won’t help out with childcare when older.

Like when you try and call a cat over when pspspspsps doesn't work?😂

Agesist and sexist.

What is it with this new thing of thinking a baby is an item to own and keep private rather than a being to be loved and raised?

People seem to want to be fawned over in pregnancy, bought baby gifts and then for those people to have nothing to do with the baby until they are about 3 when childcare offers should be plentiful.

You are not unreasonable at all. It was a long time ago for me but I just didn’t like all the visitors. I don’t agree with babies being passed around. They need to settle with Mum and Dad and can get germs from all the different visitors. My mother arrived with a virus!