Is it anybody's place to....

[Theedgeoftheabyss]

Suggest a child is neurodivergent off the back of a tantrum? Family member. I wouldn't dream of commenting on their children.

Nope. They need to keep their nose out of it

This is the wrong place to ask that! Posters here make that assumption all the time without having seen the person in the flesh even 😂

That does sound rude. If it was a genuine well meaning question, based on lots of traits and incidents, then maybe from a family member who was nice it could be ok. But otherwise no.