Anyone never married/long-term single? Can we hear some good points?

[Iknowaguywhostoughbutsweet]

I like being careful with my money, I'm not tight, but I'm not into blowing it on fancy dinners and stuff.
Something I found difficult was exes wanting to spend more money than I was comfortable with and feeling pressured into doing so, and inevitably doing so.
What I love about being single is that I'm in total control of my money.

Snoring- this seems to be something universal that women are expected to put up with. We didn't have a spare room so there were many nights on the sofa.

Difficult in-laws. Majority have been lovely, but there was one mother with whom when we were eating, I felt like we were eating with the Royal Family and the slightest 'mistake' at the dinner table would mean you were looked down upon with scorn. MIL regularly commenting on my weight 'Oh you've lost weight!' I was always a size 8 the whole time I knew her.

These are just some things I don't miss, would love to hear more :)

I'll add another one OP. You don't have to deal with whiny insecure men who just want your attention and who won't take the hint.

I've been single (mostly) since my dc were 5 and 3. Sometimes have been harder than others. Challenges have changed. So have the positives.
But I've always been able to find positives.

I've been single for 16 years, never married or had a real adult relationship I suppose. My only boyfriend was my childhood sweetheart and he is the father of my child, I was just 18 when I had DS. I left a few months later as my boyfriend was abusive and I'd had enough of it, having a child made me see sense.

Been on my own ever since, I could have easily found a man in my 20s but I just wasn't bothered, I'm still not now. I'm just so used to being alone (obviously with DS too). I like my own space. I've had casual flings but that's all I want!

Not having to share a toilet. Eww.
All money is just for me.

Long term single with kids. There is less freedom obviously when they are young but it is still a million times better than being in a relationship and just keeps getting better as they get older. Biggest pluses for me are not having to deal with someone who can't manage money and not having to listen to their (incorrect) advice on everything, particularly things they know nothing about. Nothing with ever convince me to have a romantic relationship again.

So happy single. Some of us just are much happier when we’re not in a serious relationship.

It was hard when the DC were small and I had to work five jobs to keep the roof over our heads, but that was still a much happier life than living with any man I’ve ever met (and there have been many!!)

Now they have flown the nest and I downsized to a tiny house by the sea. No stress, no ILS drama, no snoring sex pest.

It really is bliss.

Why do you want to 'touch a nerve'? You come across as someone wanting to fuck people off, people who are making genuine comments on this thread.

I don't. I made a genuine comment. People were rude to me.

There have been many insight comments here that are genuine and heartfelt.

Some just seem to be a list of "things that were shit about my ex."

Why do you object to women listing things that were shit about their ex's?

@Hateam and again with minimising what other posters have contributed.
Women stating they’re happier single obviously really does bother you for some reason. Otherwise you would be off on threads where you have a positive contribution to make, rather than trying to delegitimise what people are posting here.

Believe it or not, it really can be a lovely, fulfilling thing to be the mistress of your own destiny, and some women posting on this thread will be comparing that to relationships where they felt compromised or unsupported.
And as an aside, “bolt ya rocket” is not the same as fuck off. I would tell my 6 year old niece to bolt (ya wee rocket), I certainly wouldn’t tell her to fuck off!

I don't.
But that's just a moan and different to the fundamental positives of being single. Many posters have very eloquently described the positives of being single without framing it in the context of my ex was shit.

It doesn't bother me.

I feel some people (by no means all on this thread) over-do the single is better talk as a mechanism to convince themselves they are happier than they really are.

Fair point about Bolt ya rocket.
I've never heard it before.
I apologise for my misunderstanding.

Wow. So you're invalidating women who say they have experienced shit men in their lives and enjoying no shit men in their lives?

Are you aware that shit men are reasonably prevalent in society?

Single women live longer than married ones…

You keep telling yourself that love.

I've been single for 5 years, since my divorce. At no time have I missed being in a relationship.

I love the freedom and to be able to live my life as I choose!

I am aware there are a lot of shit men around.

I accept that many of the posters on this thread have been in relationships with shit possibly abusive men.

I have not denyed that. The feelings of those women towards men is perfectly valid.

As I have said before, when somebody is over-eager to say how happy they are, in any set of circumstances, I feel that deep down it might not be true.

Ironically that is exactly what I could have said about some of the posters announcing how happy to be single they are.

Yes they do.

Are you me??? 😃

Snap on all points. I’ll add that every spell of darkness across my life has been man related. Life is far far more pleasant single! 💖

Apart from the overwhelming sense of relief, I found that being able to decorate my own home again was wonderful. I had never realised creative freedom was so important to me.

No more putting up with his grim, tedious white walls and brown carpet. Gloomy rooms. No sunlight. Depression.

Now I live in a house with a turquoise and grey kitchen, with skylights and sunshine. Music. Bird song. Such a relief. 😊

Why is it so hard for you to accept that relationships make us miserable? And that for us on this thread we have found life much better single? What are you trying to achieve here? If you’re a regular on MN surely you’ve seen constant DH related misery on here! 🤷🏼‍♀️
For me personally I have male friends & I like my male colleagues but get into another relationship? Not a chance.

@Meadowfinch I’ve just bought a little house and it’s a source of joy everyday. I can poke around and practice frankly rubbish gardening skills. It’s a fixer upper and I’ve got my eye on a super feminine pink and green design that looks like a flapper girls boudoir. I had a whole burrata for dinner last night with tomatoes and basil and olive oil and chillis. If you had told me at 35 I’d still be single at 41 I would have been inconsolable. It was definitely undersold to me!

Sorry, the bathroom will be a flapper’s boudoir, not the whole house. That would be a bit much.