Paying to attend a baby shower???

[Sunshinemarie]

A work colleague/friend has invited me to their baby shower which is £20 to attend! Is this normal nowadays? Just seems a lot when the expectation for baby showers is to take a gift aswell.

That is the principle of hospitality though.

Agree with PPs some wires got seriously crossed during the importation of this "ghastly American tradition" to the UK. But hey turning a profit and feeling superior kills two birds with one stone.

Really ?? FFS
A wedding dress is bad enough, but why would you buy a dress which you categorically can never wear again just when your income is about to go down.

That is lunacy.

Signed a '90s grunge chick.

Only been to one. It was in restaurant which did afternoon tea. Everyone paid for own afternoon tea and any drinks they consumed didn't even occur to me to be annoyed by this. I wasn't paying to attend I was paying for the afternoon tea it was a price per person. On otherhand if it was house or in hall and I was expected to pay towards it I probably wouldn't go.

Literally the whole point of a baby shower is presents for the baby!

Please tell me more about the baby showers abroad?

my eldest dd had a baby shower at my home, her sister paid for it and there was food, drink and party games

niw dd 2 is having a baby shower and just wants cake and party games. No charging for guests

You have to pay me to go to a baby shower.

I wish the whole concept of baby showers & gender reveals would disappear back to the US.

Just another excuse for the grabby & attenion seeking to con additional gifts out of people outside of births & birthdays.

And asking guests to pay to attend is a whole other level of CFery.

I though it made sense to have a baby shower and get gifts for baby then. As parents then know what’s left to purchase before babies arrival and don’t duplicate items

Exactly this 😂😂😂 They’re hideous!!

I made it perfectly clear when I got pregnant that I DO NOT want a baby shower. I think they’re obnoxious. Can’t speak for the American ones but over here they scream “buy me stuff”. I’ve never been to one and I never will!

I hope you declined!

When I die and go to hell, the devil will be holding an eternal baby shower for some overprivileged Mum and her 30 something friends. There will be squealing, nauseating sentimentality, pink balloons and dodgy sandwiches forever.

I suppose that's fair enough, but don't charge people to attend a party where you're bringing a gift for the baby.

You're only a casual acquaintance from
Work so there is no pressing need to attend.

I would just buy a small gift when baby is born.

I’ve been to a few like this because it was a high tea or similar. Things are more of an ‘event’ now I think, evolving over time. As is normal. No doubt the trend will come full circle and home-based low-key events will be the thing for a while.

Of course I’m not friends with ‘grabby entitled’ people, so I don’t need to worry about that.

Of the 4 I've attended, one has been at a home.

The other 3 were out at a restaurant, where we all paid our way

They've also all been arranged by a group of us, and kept as a surprise from the mum to be. I've never been to a shower organised by her.

Any event which takes place outside of the home I would always assume I would pay my own way for, plus extra to cover the mum to be/hen/whatever.

And I'm happy to do it. Chances are, if I'm invited, I am their friend. And why would i begrudge paying for my own meal when it comes with the opportunity to spend time with friends?

Seems mean spirited to cry CF-ery about someone not covering the full cost, all whilst complaining about having to cover just your own. Probably best all round to just not attend.

Any event taking place outside the home, you'd assume you pay?
I've never paid to attend a wedding, a children's party, an anniversary or a leaving party. To all of those events I have taken a gift.

I attended one where the baby had a “list”, like a wedding list, so nothing got duplicated. I thought it was a good idea as it was minimal effort to do it online.

This isn't a party though, is it?

It's a meal/afternoon tea/whatever the event.

Completely different from a party in a function room.

there's nothing that annoys me more than people who spend other peoples money. Just politely decline.

Never understand the mumsnet hatred for baby showers, hen parties, gender reveals, destination weddings… actually anything remotely fun that costs money.

Its twenty quid for gods sake, your likely getting an afternoon tea/food and a lovely afternoon with your friends celebrating a new baby. Take some £5 bibs if it offends you so greatly… or just don’t go at all.

I wouldn’t go to a pay to attend function that’s a friend’s/family private event. Send a congratulations on being pregnant card instead. Once the baby is born then send a gift of your choice and/or a card.

Right, so it's not a party? What is it?

It’s a fundraising exercise to generate gifts for the parents to be. It’s not a party and they are not fun. Usually middle of the day, orange juice based! Not my idea of a party 🕺

Babyshowers are just so common on all levels, paid for or not
Americanisation of the UK rolls on unabated

I hope the rest of you didn't organise anything for her. How fucking entitled can you get?!