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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Don’t Tell The Bride - All The Men Are Awful!

55 replies

GoodTimes10 · 07/01/2024 12:54

Currently watching some old Don’t Tell The Bride episodes I haven’t seen before and have one question….why are these women saddling themselves with these losers?
None of the men seem like fully functioning adults. They are big kids who should be at home with mummy. They don’t/can’t do housework? They don’t/can’t look after the kids? Their mates are usually total losers too.
And then on top of that they try to organise a wedding and most of them don’t even know what size dress she is? They give her the worst hen do imaginable and have no idea at all of what wedding she would like? (though I expect the groom is made to choose something outlandish to make the show better).
AIBU to wonder how many of these marriages ended in divorce?

OP posts:
Jessforless · 07/01/2024 12:55

I always thought the show must be faked… surely the production lead them in certain directions for the drama?

RandomButtons · 07/01/2024 12:57

The production companies clearly pick the most useless or cra.y idea ones they can find. All plays into the “men are hopeless” narrative they like to paint. Very sexist tbh.

I’ve watched a few episodes where the men did really well to be fair.

Hiddenvoice · 07/01/2024 12:59

It’s slightly altered for tv. My brother applied and got through quite a few interview stages. He and his fiancee had already discussed their ideal wedding but the company didn’t want to know and kept asking him about what silly ideas he could come up with. When they found out we have several brothers, they asked if my brothers would stay in the house for the week and have a few parties etc. They also had approved shops that my brother could go into to pick the dress, outfits and decorations and where we are based, it was all costume and fancy dress shops.
My brother didn’t want to look like an idiot on tv so backed out.
They got another local guy to go on the show and convinced him to put paint on the wedding dress 🤦‍♀️Be then used the money from the show to arrange a proper wedding with his wife.

ILikeItWhatIsIt · 07/01/2024 13:01

It's because it's TV. Just because it's called a reality show doesn't mean it's real. All reality shows are scripted (or at least partially so). If they weren't set up or scripted to create drama, it would be very boring to watch. Hope that helps.

Original poster
GoodTimes10 · 07/01/2024 13:05

ILikeItWhatIsIt · 07/01/2024 13:01

It's because it's TV. Just because it's called a reality show doesn't mean it's real. All reality shows are scripted (or at least partially so). If they weren't set up or scripted to create drama, it would be very boring to watch. Hope that helps.

I get that most if not all of the wedding ideas are made to be as crazy and stupid as possible.

OP posts:
PossumintheHouse · 07/01/2024 13:10

You should look up the episode where the groom decided to have a beer-themed wedding when his fiancée didn’t like beer. It was at a beer museum and he was wearing a German-themed beer costume. She was raging, ripped her wedding dress off and didn’t go through with the wedding in the end.

Also the one where the arsehole of a groom had his stag do in Ibiza while sending her down the local pub. He bought tickets for them to get married in Vegas but could only afford to host her parents and sister, so he told her she had to leave her brother and other family members behind.

Jessforless · 07/01/2024 13:12

Where are you watching this? You’ve inspired me 😂

Original poster
GoodTimes10 · 07/01/2024 13:19

Jessforless · 07/01/2024 13:12

Where are you watching this? You’ve inspired me 😂

More 4 😄

OP posts:
GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 07/01/2024 13:22

Yeah I think they persuade them / encourage them to be as ridiculous as possible.

Very naive of people to go on thinking they’ll get a lovely wedding/ the wedding they hoped for, as it’s not going to be good telly.

Seadreamers · 07/01/2024 13:23

It wouldn’t make good tv entertainment if the groom organised a wedding to what the bride likes. The more outlandish and ridiculous ideas the better, and a selfish groom who priorities his stag do over the hen do is the norm unfortunately. They also usually come across as immature and thoughtless.

EvilElsa · 07/01/2024 13:26

It's very much fed reality TV. They are not allowed to have "normal" undramatic weddings because, frankly, it would be shit viewing and nobody would watch. There's a big thread somewhere on the Internet (I remember reading it years ago) where quite a few people who were on the show explain how it worked and how much was set up for cameras. The dresses for example -they had a limited number to pick from, it wasn't free choice. It was a fun show, but about as real as TOWIE and Made in Chelsea.

Wytchy · 07/01/2024 13:26

I used to love watching this back in the day.

All the couples they chose were pretty young if memory serves, so they were always going to go for the wackier ideas. I remember the underwater wedding being a standout.

The grooms on the Irish version seemed a bit more sensible.

Soubriquet · 07/01/2024 13:29

Also the one where the arsehole of a groom had his stag do in Ibiza while sending her down the local pub. He bought tickets for them to get married in Vegas but could only afford to host her parents and sister, so he told her she had to leave her brother and other family members behind.

I remember that one. I was gobsmacked when she went and got married anyway

BeingATwatItsABingThing · 07/01/2024 13:29

They are set up to be as ridiculous as possible. I’m tee-total so my DH would have been encouraged to plan a major piss-up for my hen do. I had a fitted (to the hips) dress so DH would have been told to buy a short dress or a massive ball gown and that would be considered tame. They want the drama. It’s entertaining to watch a bloke make a twat of himself and plan a wedding at the top of a mountain in the pissing rain so the bride needs to parachute in complete with poofy dress.

Original poster
GoodTimes10 · 07/01/2024 13:30

Wytchy · 07/01/2024 13:26

I used to love watching this back in the day.

All the couples they chose were pretty young if memory serves, so they were always going to go for the wackier ideas. I remember the underwater wedding being a standout.

The grooms on the Irish version seemed a bit more sensible.

I understand they are made to choose rubbish themes and go against what the bride wants. At the beginning when they are chatting to the couple they always come across as complete losers. Why would someone even agree to be made to look like a dick on telly 🤣

OP posts:
BeingATwatItsABingThing · 07/01/2024 13:33

Why would someone even agree to be made to look like a dick on telly

For the money and attention.

Wytchy · 07/01/2024 13:33

Oh yessssss, the Vegas one. Why did she marry him?

Quality 00s entertainment Grin

jannier · 07/01/2024 13:33

They have to be out there to get picked a normal idea no longer makes TV. The couples do it for a free wedding and to be on tv

Toottooot · 07/01/2024 13:33

Aren’t the women also stupid for agreeing to go on a tv show that solely exists to have ridiculous weddings?

CaravaggiosCat · 07/01/2024 13:34

Lol my daughters ex did the only episode to ever get pulled because the bride accessed his emails to find out what he was planning. Hilarious....couldn't have happened to a nicer bloke 🤭.

throughgrittedteeth · 07/01/2024 13:37

A girl I went to school with was on DTTB quite early on - season 3 maybe? It definitely is real. She said they went to a wedding fair 2 weeks after getting engaged and applied and within a month of that they were married. Really pushy production team and her (now ex) husband was a dick.

Original poster
GoodTimes10 · 07/01/2024 13:38

CaravaggiosCat · 07/01/2024 13:34

Lol my daughters ex did the only episode to ever get pulled because the bride accessed his emails to find out what he was planning. Hilarious....couldn't have happened to a nicer bloke 🤭.

I watched this today! Yanks and Chenise. I felt sorry for him 🤣

OP posts:
Snowpatrolling · 07/01/2024 13:40

An old friend of mine was on this!
they made her out to be a drama queen, and him a thicko, when in reality they are the nicest people you’d ever meet. They were told what to say and given scripted dramatics. He wasn’t allowed to pick the dress he thought she’d like in case she had told him before what style she wanted, so had to pick something different, also made him go one size up! It’s all twisted for good tv.

CaravaggiosCat · 07/01/2024 13:40

GoodTimes10 · 07/01/2024 13:38

I watched this today! Yanks and Chenise. I felt sorry for him 🤣

Show quote history

Haha yeah..don't 😄

Original poster
GoodTimes10 · 07/01/2024 13:42

Toottooot · 07/01/2024 13:33

Aren’t the women also stupid for agreeing to go on a tv show that solely exists to have ridiculous weddings?

My point isn’t that they choose outlandish themes for the wedding, I’m talking about the way the men are portrayed at the beginning of the episode. When they chat to the couples and the man says something like “I don’t know how to use the washing machine” or “I’ve never cooked a meal in my life” I think why are you marrying a loser like this 🤣

OP posts: