On holiday. Patio door left unlocked.

[Longlazyday]

Was I unreasonable coming home? The door was unlocked. I can’t gauge because I worry and have no one local who can support, consequently very risk averse.

I had done all the ‘leave the house safe and secure’ checks before leaving yesterday morning. Just dropped the baton on this one because door isn’t used. Had a visitor who used it. Last night realised the patio was very likely unlocked.

Travelled 150 miles to come home. I couldn’t have settled knowing it was unlocked.

You wouldn't have been able to relax.

If this isn't a prompt to make friends with someone local to hold a key for you, I don't know what is.

But obviously you did the right thing in going home this time. You'd have been fretting if you hadn't.

Thanks for the reassurance.

Key holder - absolutely a priority. I had an epiphany this morning when I realised this is a necessity. Live alone so asking for help is a skill quickly lost.

I would have done the same.

YANBU if you went back to your holiday.

YABU if your anxiety cut short your holiday and / or you used it as an excuse not to go.

I would have stayed to the end of my holiday. I do live in a very low-crime area though. I have a friend with a key too.

Have a list - mine is on an Excel spreadsheet, printed off - including everything that must be checked (list things such as doors individually) and have an absolute rule that nothing is to be ticked off until you have physically checked it - even if you are 100% sure a door is locked, it is not ticked until it's been checked. Mine has everything that must be locked, unplugged, switched off, put in a secure place etc. as well as a packing checklist.

I am a very anxious person and the reassurance of my list is the only thing that makes it possible for me to go away.

Ha! Did something similar. We were half way to Germany and I couldn't remember if either of us had turned off the gas hob. I knew there was no pan on it, so unlikely to cause a fire, just use up a lot of gas for the 10 days we were away.

Fortunately I have someone who is incredible and I sent a OMG message about "I hope I'm wrong about this..." She drove by the house, stopped sniffed about (literally) and messaged me to say "nothing burning, no smoke, is there anyway I can do anything more?" Well beyond what I had expected frankly. So CF that I can be (I'm not I don't think really) I said "well next time you're driving by if you pull in there's a key safe and you can get inside and check." Which she did!!! Even sent me a picture to confirm!! What an absolute champion!!!!!!!

All ok - just completely in my addled brain that the gas was on!!!

Depends how accessible your patio is, really. The back of my house would involve climbing several fences to access so I wouldn’t worry.

I’m a big fan of ‘the list’ too. Mine’s not as detailed as that but I do like to know what I need to do.