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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To call the police???

15 replies

Sophie2525 · 27/12/2023 20:31

My neighbours of 5 years have been a bit toxic I guess, we have nothing to do with them, however we have heard him kick of many of times. Nothing enough to call the police for but enough to be wary of his temper. Tonight I heard banging for a while, after a while I was concerned, so I put my ear to the wall, and it genuinely sounded like a women screaming. It haunted me, I was shaking and called for 999, they visited and then called me to say all is good. Maybe they were having wild sex, I don’t know but I feel like an absolute idiot. I’m their only neighbour so they will know it was me!!! Help!!!?

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 27/12/2023 20:31

Call. Think of the consequences otherwise.

Original poster
Sophie2525 · 27/12/2023 20:33

I have called, sorry to add, the police called me and said everything seems fine

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 27/12/2023 20:34

Oops missed that.

If everything's OK then maybe they will be more considerate in future!

Original poster
Sophie2525 · 27/12/2023 20:34

So basically the police have confirmed I was wrong, I feel like a totally dick. What do I do!!

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 27/12/2023 20:44

They haven't confirmed you were wrong by any stretch of the imagination. Just that they were told it was OK. There are two possible explanations:

There really is nothing to worry about. In which case you understand that and feel good that you cared enough to call. They feel sheepish and keep the noise down.

There is something to worry about the police didn't manage to catch this time. Hopefully the bloke is now on notice.

SutWytTi · 27/12/2023 20:47

Sophie2525 · 27/12/2023 20:34

So basically the police have confirmed I was wrong, I feel like a totally dick. What do I do!!

You weren't wrong. You were concerned, you called the right service, they made an assessment.

You don't do anything now, you just let your feelings settle down.

Isseywith3witchycats · 27/12/2023 20:48

You did the right thing a few years ago i did the same as i could hear raised voices and the next door lady screaming, police came and carted him off the next day she said thank you to me and he never came back to the house

Redglitter · 27/12/2023 20:54

Sophie2525 · 27/12/2023 20:34

So basically the police have confirmed I was wrong, I feel like a totally dick. What do I do!!

No they haven't. They've confirmed everything is OK at your neighbours. You absolutely did the right thing.

You don't do anything else. Forget about it. Its a shame more people don't have neighbours like you.

Danielle9891 · 27/12/2023 21:26

You did the right thing and I would have done the same. You never know, they could have used the 'loud sex' excuse to get the police off their back and cover up domestic violence.

Wateroverwine · 27/12/2023 21:34

I have an evil neighbour and You're a nicer person then me that's all I gotta say.

Dotjones · 27/12/2023 21:37

Don't worry about it - the police checked that nothing untoward was going on. If every police check turned out to be unnecessary that'd be a good thing, because nothing bad was happening.

The lesson to take away is that it's not worth calling the police unless you're certain someone is in immediate danger - but don't feel bad about this mistake.

Jojobees · 27/12/2023 21:38

I had the same a few years back. Neighbour screaming you are going to kill me… lots of banging. Called the police. They were playing a video game. 🤦‍♀️ she came round a few days later with flowers thanking us for actually caring enough to do something.

Katemax82 · 27/12/2023 22:05

I rung the police because I walked past a couple in a van and the man was really shouting at the woman (they looked in their 20s) and I heard a child crying. I just wish someone had done the same for me when my husband lost it 14 years ago one night

Princesspollyyy · 28/12/2023 09:10

You said you heard banging, could the 'scream' have been a drill? Depending on what's being drilled it can make that type of noise sometimes.

Hellocatshome · 28/12/2023 09:29

The police are not going to tell you details, so a quick its fine is likely all you will get even if it isn't.

They both probably acted like all was fine when the police got there, even if the police clearly could see it isn't there isnt a lot they can do if both parties refuse to say anything had happened.

Hopefully you calling will make the woman realise that what is happening isn't normal and make him realise people can hear what he is doing and are not scared to report it.

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