To expect help with Christmas prep from older kids, adult children?

[Allshallbewell2021]

Dd (15) has just got up and is slumped over cereal. DS (20s) is very hungover and is just getting in the shower. I've been up since 7.30 (a lie-in for me).
I know I didn't train 'em young enough!

They should be helping...but have you actually given them specific tasks, or are you expecting them to know?
Start dishing out jobs!

Absolutely they should be helping, but do be specific about what they need to do.

define Christmas prep? It’s only the 23rd

At 15 I would have needed to be given a job to do, early 20’s is definitely old enough to know what needs doing and get on with it.

I’ve got a list for our 4 tomorrow. No phones or Fortnite until we are done!

Endless specific tasks given; all answered with "In a minute".

Then they disappear often to a bathroom...... never to be seen again in daylight.

Fine. Then they don't get to eat the things you asked them to help with

Well then I'd take the attitude what doesn't get done doesn't get done, they clearly aren't fussed about Christmas so I wouldn't bend myself out of shape to do everything they can't be bothered to do

😆 it's so tempting

Send them a message with a list of tasks to their phone. Specify a time when all jobs should be completed.

Little Red Hen time.

If you've asked them to peel potatoes, and they don't do it, then you prep only enough for one portion for yourself. And you do not share it. Although if you're not bothered going without whatever you've asked them to do, then just don't do it at all.

No fuss. No bother.