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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it’s a total waste of time (elf)

37 replies

Direstraightsagain · 29/11/2023 22:38

I’ve never done ‘elf on the shelf’. Full time job. Busy life. Kids not bothered. Loads of my friend have and they get really tense about what they are going to do each day.. or thank god it’s nearly over! It’s really doesn’t sound fun. Why would you put yourself though trashing your own house to pretend to your kids (who know it’s you anyway) that some elf if trashing your house every night in the run up to Christmas… is no one else busy.

OP posts:
NotSorry · 29/11/2023 22:40

So glad my kids are grown up and I didn’t have the pressure of getting involved in this

paddyclampofthethirdkind · 29/11/2023 22:40

YANBU! I so couldn’t be arsed with it!

TheKeatingFive · 29/11/2023 22:41

Because my kids love it. I'm not trashing the house however, to be clear.

pavillion1 · 29/11/2023 22:41

oh my kids didnt know for a good few years , They loved it ... Cant say i ever trashed my house .

Adayofreadinginbed · 29/11/2023 22:45

I’m doing it for the first time this year and am excited 😂

Bournetilly · 29/11/2023 22:48

Some kids enjoy it and some believe it’s real. I’m doing it for the first year and definitely won’t be trashing my house, I know my daughter will be excited and it makes it more magical.

XelaM · 29/11/2023 22:48

Just move the elf around - what’s the big deal?! It literally takes 30 seconds. No need to trash the house. People like to create drama out of anything. It’s hardly a big chore.

angelikacpickles · 29/11/2023 22:49

We got an elf years ago, before all this trashing the house thing caught on. Our elf just moves from place to place overnight. There are no antics. He also only appears in mid-December. I can just about cope with that. I guess if people want to do the other stuff, then why not?

Divebar2021 · 29/11/2023 22:49

Some people actually enjoy it…. Lots of kids love it and the little ones do very much believe it. No one’s being coerced into doing it if they don’t want too.

littlefifi · 29/11/2023 22:52

Ahh the elf bashing has started already.

Look, it's not compulsory. But there also doesn't need to be a million snarky threads from people who are too busy/too unbothered/to cool to do it either.

We love our elf. He doesn't do anything fancy, he just moves about but it's something my dc have grown up with and enjoy as a Christmas tradition every year. If you don't do it it's totally fine but I don't understand why people have to slate it. It's as simple as you want to make it.

JamieKnows · 29/11/2023 22:53

You're so cool OP

StarDolphins · 29/11/2023 22:54

I do it, my DD 7 loves it. It costs nothing (bar the elf, fewquid 4 years ago) it’s a nice distraction to whatever crap is going on in life. When she’s a teen, I will definitely look back & be glad I did it.

I just do quick, fun things each night, wouldn’t do anything messy or time consuming.

purpleme12 · 29/11/2023 22:54

Well the point is the fun the child gets out of it.
And I have to say I really don't get myself in a tizz about it.
The elf can be as hard or as simple as you want to make it really.
So....

FirstFallopians · 29/11/2023 22:55

Everyone’s different I guess, but it’s just another thing to add to the mental load in December and I can’t be fucked.

Getting tucked into bed at night and then realising we haven’t moved the sodding elf. No thanks.

I think back on my Christmases as a child of the early 90s and there was plenty of magic and excitement from a supermarket advent calendar and the potential of getting a few things I’d circled in the Argos catalogue, so I don’t think my pair are missing out by us not doing it.

TheKeatingFive · 29/11/2023 22:55

Look, it's not compulsory. But there also doesn't need to be a million snarky threads from people who are too busy/too unbothered/to cool to do it either.

Exactly. Do it, don't do it - who cares? Suit yourself.

Moonshine5 · 29/11/2023 22:56

To each his (her) own
If it brings joy, why are you bugging.

TheKeatingFive · 29/11/2023 22:56

so I don’t think my pair are missing out by us not doing it.

I don't think anyone said they were ...

LoveBluey · 29/11/2023 22:56

I have 2 small children and just don't do it. I don't really 'get it' and don't want to do it. I love Christmas and do plenty of other fun things with them but this just doesn't appeal. I don't think they are missing out and I don't feel any pressure or have to jump out of bed at night when I inevitably forget to move the bloody elf.

MotherOfMonkeys0 · 29/11/2023 22:56

We do it, it makes us all laugh, gets funnier as the kids get older as the humour changes, and eldest gets involved now. We certainly don't trash the house though. Just simple things that take a couple of minutes to set up. And yes, I do have a very busy life.

If you don't like it, don't do it. I don't understand why it bothers people so much.

WhycantIkeepthisbloodyplantalive · 29/11/2023 22:57

We did it last year. The first 10 nights were fun and then it just became a chore. We told the kids, the elf only comes once because they have so many other children to visit, they seemed to buy it.

It doesn't bother me that others do it, I'm sure a lot of people enjoy it.

FirstFallopians · 29/11/2023 22:58

TheKeatingFive · 29/11/2023 22:56

so I don’t think my pair are missing out by us not doing it.

I don't think anyone said they were ...

Yes, and? I was making an observation.

TheKeatingFive · 29/11/2023 23:00

I was making an observation.

But why mention it? Why would you think they were? Every house has its own specific Christmas things.

DrCoconut · 29/11/2023 23:00

I'm with @FirstFallopians on it. I just don't bother with it. Up to others what they do though.

smilesup · 29/11/2023 23:01

I could have done it for maybe 4 or 5 years but because of the spacing of our kids it would have been about 18 years. I think I would have murdered the little fucker by now. We have a lovely wooden advent calendar that we have to remember to put in a wooden decoration (brought by the fairies) each night and sometimes a chocolate. Fuck me is that hard, those fairies are as shit at remembering as the tooth fairy after child number 4, tooth 46

Ffsnotaconference · 29/11/2023 23:02

My kids are older (one is an adult) so we don’t do it.

But plenty of people I know do. Non of them trash their house and non of them are stressed out.

Most simply move the elf. So it might be on a tree one day and the. The next hanging from a room light. The next on the book case.

I would imagine the appeal is that people’s kids enjoy it. The great thing, you don’t have to do it. You don’t have to trash your house or take it to a point where it stresses you out. Those are all choices. You can choose not to do it. Choose to do it in a low key way. Choose not to trash your house