Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

Original poster

AIBU to not let brother borrow suitcase

19 replies

Hol932 · 19/10/2023 19:01

My brother who travels very frequently including on long haul flights for 2-3 weeks at a time has asked to borrow my rather expensive suitcase.
I invested in my suitcase with the hope of it lasting a long time. I also travel maybe once a year.
I said no and he replied ‘I would have let you borrow mine if you asked’ and then stopped talking to me.
The thing is, he’s going travelling around a third world country where it will likely be chucked around a lot and so I was worried that it would get damaged. If it was a normal holiday I wouldn’t have mind and have let him borrow it on such occasion before. I did explain that but he didn’t reply.
We are also quite different with our money. I generally feel like I am more responsible than he is, which also bothers me as to why he asked. He earns around the same as me as well and can easily afford one especially considering how often he travels!

AIBU- you should have let him borrow it
YANBU- you were right not to let him borrow it

OP posts:

CesareBorgia · 19/10/2023 19:01

I'd be very wary with the current bed bug plague!

cushioncovers · 19/10/2023 19:04

If he can afford to travel he can buy his own suitcase

LadyB49 · 19/10/2023 19:08

I'd lend him an old suitcase that I use to store stuff in the attic.
what has he used in previous travels.
He could buy one from a charity shop.

AhBiscuits · 19/10/2023 19:09

He can afford a holiday but not a suitcase? I'd tell him to piss off.

GasPanic · 19/10/2023 19:10

I guess there are suitcases and suitcases.

Some sort of pink designer thing with glitter that is expensive then yes YANBU.

If he is going to have to get another one sooner or later why not get it now.

Someone else will probably have one he can borrow.

I would prepare yourself for the moment when the luggage chute spits out your lovely case after giving it a good mangling though.

Boozlebammed · 19/10/2023 19:11

Nooo they're so expensive and every time they go on a flight they get bashed about so much. Every time someone else uses them is one trip closer to you having to buy a new one. I never lend mine, buy your bloody own!

BashfulClam · 19/10/2023 19:19

I will never lend a case again. Gave a fairly good quality brand new one to MIL to borrow and she fucking gave it away to some random guy in her hairdressers. He said he needed to go and buy a case and she said ‘you can have mine!’ I get angry every time i think about it as it was expensive and used once! Now our luggage doesn’t match. She asked for a case/bag for her next holiday and I said ‘oh no we don’t have any spare ones, we gave you our spare one a while ago.’

Soontobe60 · 19/10/2023 19:23

Me and my DDs share our suitcases. They’re not cheapo ones either. But whats the point in having suitcases stored away for 50 weeks of the year in every loft in the country? What a complete waste of resources.
The agreement is, if one of us breaks a suitcase, they are responsible for buying a replacement by the time the next person who needs it is going on holiday.

McIntire · 19/10/2023 19:25

I don’t let anyone borrow my expensive suitcase.

Antst · 19/10/2023 19:30

YANBU. He won't take care of it and even if he did, suitcases can be beaten up.

Also, his reaction (freezing you out) demonstrates that he doesn't deserve a favour. He's trying to bully you into giving it to him. You should refuse to lend him anything until he grows up.

ThelmaBorden · 19/10/2023 19:30

charity shops always have suitcases of Ll shPes Nd sizes, cheP as they dont really want them taking up space

Humidititties · 19/10/2023 19:31

Soontobe60 · 19/10/2023 19:23

Because it's hers, it was expensive and OP probably wants to get more than a couple of trips out it

ThelmaBorden · 19/10/2023 19:31

sigh
all shapes and sizes and cheap

also cheap from Argos,
Primark,
Sainsbury

MrsKwazi · 19/10/2023 19:32

YANBU. Proper luggage is v expensive, and travel insurance never pays out enough to cover damage.

nettie434 · 19/10/2023 19:33

I don't think you should lend anything that you would be upset not to get back or get back in a damaged state.

Your brother is being unreasonable to ask to borrow an expensive suitcase. He can't prevent it from being thrown about by baggage handlers, or getting lost or stolen.

NotFastButFurious · 19/10/2023 19:35

Do you think an airline will treat it any differently because it’s an expensive suitcase?
that said, I still wouldn’t lend it to him. There’s plenty of reasonably priced suitcases around, particularly at this time of year as the peak travel season comes to an end. My best piece of luggage came
from Argos!

Original poster

Hol932 · 19/10/2023 19:39

Thanks everyone for mostly understanding. I did direct him to some websites where he could get some luggage. I also asked what suitcase he’s been using for his long haul holidays recently and he just replied ‘it’s fine’. Very mature!

OP posts:

Original poster

Hol932 · 19/10/2023 19:56

NotFastButFurious · 19/10/2023 19:35

Oh no, the reason I bought the one I did was because it’s very sturdy hence the price (of course not always the case) so hope it will take more bashings than the average suitcase and hence last longer for myself

OP posts:

2jacqi · 19/10/2023 19:59

what does he usually pack his clothes in for all those travels?? a "bag for life"????? bloody cheek, he can get his own suitcase, especially at this time of bed bug panic! they will hitch a lift in your suitcase and spread in your bro's home as well as yours!!!!

Flip