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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

What would you think of this?

23 replies

MovieQueen12 · 28/08/2023 12:48

A 60 something woman always seeming to stand up for criminals or defend them. For example,
Rolf Harris- ' Maybe it was because of his art work and that's why he got accused.'
Harold Shipman- 'I think he genuinely thought he was helping these old people by killing them.'
Lucy Letby- 'I just feel she's innocent.'

OP posts:
Keyworks · 28/08/2023 12:50

This reply has been deleted

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Sparklesocks · 28/08/2023 12:51

So this is an individual you know?
She might be one of those difficult people who delights in being contrary and playing devil’s advocate

Needmorelego · 28/08/2023 12:52

"Sorry I am not interested in talking to you about this" and change the subject.
If they carry on literally get up and walk away.

MermaidEyes · 28/08/2023 12:52

I think some people just like to think they see the good in everyone and there are no bad people in the world.

JogginAintGinnaHappen · 28/08/2023 12:52

She can "feel" whatever she wants but the hard facts and evidence prove her to be an Ill-informed idiot

Veryverycalmnow · 28/08/2023 12:53

Maybe she just can't believe people are capable of evil. She sounds naiive. I would avoid conversation with that person for a while as it's horrible to hear criminals being defended like that.

Flyawaywithmehoney · 28/08/2023 12:54

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Icedlatteplease · 28/08/2023 12:54

I wouldn’t think anything.

People are allowed their own opinions.

Even if I think they are stupid.

Beezknees · 28/08/2023 12:57

I'd roll my eyes and ignore them.

MovieQueen12 · 28/08/2023 13:03

A relative. I find it really hard listening to it all the time.

OP posts:
WeWereInParis · 28/08/2023 13:06

Is she just generally contrary? Or is it specific to this issue?

10HailMarys · 28/08/2023 13:06

I’d think they were thick as mince.

fdgdfgdfgdfg · 28/08/2023 13:11

I'd say that she probably struggles with the idea that people are capable of doing such vile things, so prefers to believe they didn't really happen.

I'd roll my eyes and desperately try to stick to topics that didn't get them started if I was stuck in their company, it's not worth the argument.

SleepingStandingUp · 28/08/2023 13:19

Well it's possible they're so innocent and been exposed to so little life experience they just can't comprehend people doing bad stuff. So I'd pity them tbh.

I'd Def stop engaging in those types of convos with them

stbrandonsboat · 28/08/2023 13:42

They sound quite dim and in a state of denial regarding people doing bad things.

MrsSkylerWhite · 28/08/2023 13:45

Not sure what 60 something has to do with it. There are stupid people of all ages.

5foot5 · 28/08/2023 14:29

MovieQueen12 · 28/08/2023 13:03

A relative. I find it really hard listening to it all the time.

When you say "listening to it all the time" do you mean this is the only topic of conversation you ever have? Do you never agree on anything else?

Valerie23 · 28/08/2023 14:35

Sorry op, when I read the bit about Harold Shipman all I could think of was this -

Catusrusty · 28/08/2023 14:36

Well everyone is entitled to their opinion.

I actually think it's good to be exposed to different opinions. It's easy to find an echo chamber online these days.

She might be naive or worldly or contrary or whatever.

If you like her then surely you have the kind of relationship where you can agree to disagree. If you don't like her then why spend time with her?

Stompythedinosaur · 28/08/2023 14:50

I'd assume they were a bit thick tbh.

BeenThereDoneThat101 · 28/08/2023 15:40

I’d assume she was being deliberately contrary.

I can see how someone might hae a view on some.

I definitely think many of the older generation have a different view towards certain sexual crimes, such as those committed by certain celebs I’ve heard people say “well it was just the done thing back then that young girls slept with celebrities and nobody batted an eyelid,” so based on that I can see how someone might view Rolf Harris in a different light.

Harold Shipman - the way it was reported in the beginning when the headline said that police were exhuming a body with regards to a gp and an overdose, I did wonder whether this was a gp who had helped a patient to die. It was only when the reporting became more thorough that the true reality started to emerge.

We’ve seen people on here even suggesting that Lucy Letby is innocent and there’s been a miscarriage of justice because there just isn’t any evidence (despite the fact that the prosecution spent ten months bringing her to justice.)

But to claim innocence for all three has to be either deliberate or someone incredibly thick.

FWIW I’ve never seen anyone defending Harold Shipman or Rolf Harris on here, but I’m sure if you started a thread you could find them.

Ponoka7 · 28/08/2023 15:45

If it's every case then there's something mentally going on. But there's nothing wrong with questioning some sentences or discussing mental illness/intention. I'd just change the subject.

BeMoreBarbie · 28/08/2023 15:53

I'd assume they get a lot of their info from GB news and the daily mail.

I have experience with this as I also have a relative. She is in her 80s and doesn't have social media but every time I talk to her I'm appalled.

I used to get mad and argue against her point. Then I found a similarity and said "but what about" to try and get her to think. Now I just say that's hateful and I don't agree.

An example of this is the barbie film. I was told I must not take DD to see it because it's woke. Then Boris wrote an article on it and now it's good to see. I went to see it, I bloody loved it and I will be telling her.

These people feel how they do and the right wing media make it worse but we won't change it. It makes for interesting conversations if anything but they won't change and it's not your job to make them. Horses for courses and that as long as they are the minority.

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