To want to sit in the corner and rock gently?

[fugitall]

My parents said we could build a house in their garden, we moved into their house, got planning (took 2 1/2 yrs to achieve), now they won't sell us the land, won't let us build, and have told us it's tough. They'll give us the market value of the plot, but we can't buy a house for that amount, we could have built a lovely house for less than it will cost us to buy a tiny house.

Still live with them, but can avoid them on day to day basis. DH wants a showdown. I want to cry.

They're my parents. The are double hard bastards, always have been, so I don't want a confrontation, but DH is really cross.

Agree AdamRomANTic ..... wish I could find something that fitted round my kids so I didn't have to 'palm them off' and paid me 75k a year........

Ok. I agree it's better than a poke in the eye with a plastic daffodil.

We need to come to terms with the loss of trust and the image we had for our future.

Mum and Dad have profited too, way more than if we hadn't arsingwell bothered and stuck with our simple independent life we'd established 120 miles from them after the last ultimatum! That was when dh, under the influence of much lager and a drug spiked drink might have snogged some bird and my parents told me to leave him. I didn't. We all moved on and ended up here. I'm the silly one.

It is unhealthy. Why do I keep going back to my parents for more? I must be insecure, hence overcompensating with my own kids. That's my excuse for wanting to be a sahm.

The kids have come to work with me, which is very lucky for me.

The £120k is because the planning permission OP spent 2 years fighting for (and paid all the architect's fees for) has pushed up th value of the house + plot. Besides which, this is a promise from people who have recently broken a rather large one.
Regardless of the money, to have spent 2 years working hard towards a goal to have it go up in smoke because parents changed there minds gives anyone a right to be a bit pissed off doesn't it?

But the point isnt whether the OP has been lucky not having to work for 12 years, lived rent free for 2 years, either, or whether she is lucky to maybe get some money out of the situation in the end. Both her and her husband has worked for a pittance for her parents company, and been stringed along for two years thinking they were building on a plot separated out from parents land, and now this has changed.

Alfiesbabe, I so resent that she cannot vent over having to take up work after a 12 years career break and pay childcare for her children, when she wants to be a sahm, just because some think she has been lucky. There is nothing lucky in being stabbed in the back by your very own parents.

From your posts I'm beginning to wonder whether your parents pulled out because they couldnt face you living next door

I'm crying cause some of you have been nice to me. I need to drink less while on ad's.

The pittance is 5 hours a day, seven days a week for £385 a month, just in case you were wondering what my idea of a pittance is .

But I can't stop crying, will I be committed?

Fugitall, are you on paye with your parents?

No paye hence £385x 12 = just under min. No ssp for me when I have a nervous breakdown!

Also, any job I can get now will be 100% taxed. Thought I'd got a job last week, but it fell through. I live in the arse end of nowhere, so jobs are few and far between, until tourists get here,hence 2bed terrace for 150k.

But Dit, they're my parents, how could I insist?

100% taxed??? WTF are you on about? Or rather WTF are you on???

And I'm a bit of a shit sahm! They're sahkids!

You have all my sympathy and I certainly wouldn't class bringing up 4 dc's as not having worked for 12 years.
I agree that you should just get out from their influence and intangible debts of loyalty. there is a better future for you out there

I think you are allowed to be upset, for a short while at least while the shock of it all sinks in. Afterall, you have suddenly had the rug pulled from under you. BUT, maybe tomorrow you should try to see things in a different light, put it down to experience and then take your sisters advice!

OK 20% taxed on all I earn elsewhere. They've made me promise not to stop working there.

alf, it's amytriptilin (sp) and wine

You posted about this under a different name a while ago, I think? If I'm remembering rightly, your parents have indeed behaved vilely, and the people who are telling you to get over it and pocket the £150k are very wide of the mark. I'm so sorry it's come to this.