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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Tonsillectomy recovery

33 replies

Sarahcoggles · 14/01/2023 09:44

I posted in Health but posting here for traffic - sorry.

DS is 17 and due to do his A levels this summer. He's really struggling with his throat and has been told he needs his tonsils out. Waiting list on NHS is well over a year so with family help we're paying privately, so can basically choose when to have the operation.

He has mocks in February and the real thing starting mid May.

I know the official line is that it takes 2 weeks to recover, but I'd be interested in hearing people's actual experiences of it. We're trying to work out which 2-week block would be the least disruptive in terms of his education. We considered the Easter holidays but thought that might be a bit close to the exams.

Any thoughts?

Thank you

OP posts:

Maireas · 14/01/2023 09:49

Do it as soon as you can and get it over with. He'll probably be ok to do some school work in the second week. He just needs to eat frequently, including rough food! Sore at first, but works.

Thighlengthboots · 14/01/2023 09:54

I had a tonsilectomy in my 30s and it was the worst pain ive ever had (and i have a high pain tolerance)- worse than childbirth. My surgeon told me that adults suffer way more due to the tonsils having longer roots and so if it needs to be done, definitely get it done when young as its much less painful. The worst pain was day three- I was on tramadol, paracetamol and diclofenac and even that wasnt touching it. By day 10 I was recovered and felt back to normal. So definitely get it done now when he is young and the pain will be less.

Tonsiltrouble · 14/01/2023 09:57

My 6yo had his out a few weeks ago. I would say recovery was more like a month for him, although obviously a progressive thing, and the first 10 days were the most horrific part (pain, bleeding). He had 2 weeks off school plus the Christmas hols and was still a little ropey going back. I’d perhaps say that if you can keep him well in the interim (being really on it with antibiotics etc) I would wait til after the exams.

SnarkyBag · 14/01/2023 09:59

I had mine out in my 30’s. It is pretty unpleasant recovery wise and he should expect to not be up to anything in the first week.

I felt much better by day 10 but because I did I went out and about had my first proper coffee and promptly had a massive bleed in Costa coffee and ended up back in hospital. Day 10 is around the time the scabs start to come away so although the pain is much better there’s still risk of infection and bleeding.

Weelegs29 · 14/01/2023 10:00

I had mine out when I was 21 after years of recurring bouts of severe tonsillitis. I booked 2 weeks off work and had to take another off as I was still physically too weak due to working in a shop at the time so on my feet all day, but i would say I was over the worst of it by the time the two weeks was up. Even though the recovery pain was horrendous it was still the best thing I ever did and I'd do it again tomorrow if I had to (mostly for the post surgery weightloss to be honest 😂)

SaturdayGiraffe · 14/01/2023 10:00

Had mine out as an adult as they were chronically infected and it flattened me. I couldn’t move my head 1mm or swallow for days without excruciating pain. As pp 3 types of pain killer didn’t touch it.
I lost 6kg.
But he’s young and will probably have a far easier time. I say go for Easter.

PammyShipman · 14/01/2023 10:01

I had mine out at 17. By the end of the first week I felt like I was nearly healed, then week two hit and I felt far worse than I had in week 1 for a few days.

The pain was horrible. I've had other surgeries since and that was the worst in terms of pain during recovery.
After 2 weeks I was fine though.

SnarkyBag · 14/01/2023 10:01

If he can get in and have it done February half term then I would say go for it sooner rather than later. If he frequently gets tonsillitis you don’t want him to be ill in the run up to exams

Nutsabouttopic · 14/01/2023 10:01

My fifteen year old daughter had hers out last summer. (July 21). She got them out on a Monday and by Friday she was fine again, a little pain more discomfort than pain. She had to stay away from people for ten days to avoid infection. After the first week she was fine eating everything. It was best decision we made because she was constantly missing school.

PeopleAreToads · 14/01/2023 10:02

I had mine out at 21 and the pain was awful, I wouldn't have been in a state to do much for the first 10 days. But then my stitches split at day 10 and was back in hospital.

Complications like that aren't super rare either so I'd be prepared for him to be unable to do any work for the full 2 weeks

Original poster

Sarahcoggles · 14/01/2023 10:03

Thank you.
He's not getting tonsillitis, but his tonsils are huge, causing build up of mucous, which is in turn blocking his ears and causing constant phlegm in the back of his throat. It's really getting him down, and there's literally nothing that will ease the symptoms until the tonsils are gone. Hence not wanting to leave it till after the exams. He can barely hear anything now.

It's so frustrating because he's been waiting for the consultation for nearly 2 years, and that's why we went private in the end.

OP posts:

Unicorn2022 · 14/01/2023 10:05

Two of my kids had their tonsils removed - DS through NHS and DD2 privately just before the pandemic. Both had adenoids out at the same time. Recovery for DD2 was incredibly fast - she was eating crisps within a couple of hours of the operation and after a week you wouldn't have known she had the operation. She was playing saxophone at usual standard within a month.

They normally do the private tonsillectomies on a Saturday at our hospital so if it was me I would get it done on the Saturday after they break up for half term in Feb and give him half term to recover.

InDubiousBattle · 14/01/2023 10:07

My (very fit and healthy 22 year old)nephew had his out recently and he was very poorly. As pp have said he had lots of painkillers in the days immediately after the operation then ended up being re admitted with an infection. He was off work for 3 weeks and lost a lot of weight but recovered well and was back to normal quickly after the initial 2-3 weeks. Worth it though as he'd been hospitalised several times with Quincy and was getting infections so regularly.

WildCherryBlossom · 14/01/2023 10:09

I had mine out when I was slightly older than your DS OP. The first week I was pretty much in bed and on regular pain killers. By day 10 I was up and about again but still a bit tender. Back to normal after 2 weeks. I remember the absolute joy of eating nachos after years and years of tonsillitis and pain swallowing, Such a relief to get rid of them!

SnarkyBag · 14/01/2023 10:13

i will say although recovery is tough as an adult the freedom of being tonsil free is totally worth it!!

HowcanIhelp123 · 14/01/2023 10:14

I had my tonsils out at almost 30 and had read about how horrendous it was but mine was very much the opposite. Mine had been chronically infected and I'd been admitted to hospital twice for IV antibiotics. I'd already lost weight as they were so big I choked when trying to eat.

An hour after the op I was eating a sandwich, while the nurse looked on in shock at how quick it was going down. I was just so happy to have so much room there. Home same night, next day I ate pizza and crisps. All I had was paracetamol and ibruprofen after leaving hospital. I would say the referred ear pain from my throat was the worst but very manageable. Couldn't talk without pain for 2 weeks but if I didn't talk, tbh I felt pretty normal in a couple days. I had no complications or bleeding.

Do encourage him to eat harder food as it takes off the scabs in smaller bits. When people only eat ice lollies it can come off in much bigger bits that pull off more that isn't ready yet and that tends to be when people have bigger bleeds (not always, thats just what I was warned).

Original poster

Sarahcoggles · 14/01/2023 10:15

Thanks all. Ideally half term would be good but he has mocks straight after, and whilst they aren't really that important, it'll batter his morale if he goes in unprepared, having been in bed for the preceding week.
I'm thinking of asking for asap. There seems no good time, and maybe best to just get it done.

OP posts:

DrinkReprehensibly · 14/01/2023 10:22

I had my tonsils out in Jan 2020 at age 39 due to an abscess and I needed 3 weeks to be fully better. The first 2 weeks felt like I wasn't improving at all and then I suddenly felt a lot better. If I had a pound for every person who joked about how I'd get to eat lots of icecream I'd be rich, but it's best to eat properly as they advise. It hurts but you'll recover better and quicker. Eating icecream the whole time means you just build up scar tissue I hear.

Anyway, I'm fully better now and it was a really good decision. I'm a singer and no long term issues.

The whole thing was painful but the abscess was bloody painful so maybe I found the tonsillectomy more tolerable having had that prior. I set a timer to make sure I took painkillers regularly and that got me through.

Spanisheomellletttes · 14/01/2023 10:30

I used to nurse kids straight after their tonsillectomy. In my opinion, pain-management is the biggest predictor of how fast a child recovers. Eg: a young child refuses pain meds because it hurts to swallow, which delays them swallowing, which increases their fear of pain and so on in a circle.

Pain relief would be better IV, in my opinion, but the kids really need it regularly to recover quickly.

I have to say, I still feel a little traumatised by the excrutiating pain children suffer post-tonsillectomy. Anecdotally, at least, pain is poorly managed, poor little mites.

Tonsiltrouble · 14/01/2023 10:32

In that case he might be better opting for the ‘guillotine method’ and just have them lopped off. Recovery for that is way easier. I think if you are going down this route you should ditch the mocks (unless his recovery is miraculous) and see what school can do about alternate prep.

HowcanIhelp123 · 14/01/2023 13:28

To an extent I think recovery is a mix of luck and how bad the journey to the surgery has been. As I said I found recovery fairly easy but the tonsillitis was so bad I'd had 2 lots of 4 day hospital stays trying to reduce my tonsils from blocking 90% of my airway. Breathing and swallowing was awful. Comparatively the tonsillectomy where I went into hospital just before midday, out by 10pm that evening and could breathe and swallow freely again was clearly much better! The (very manageable) pain was well worth it after that months of difficulty I'd had.

Unicorn2022 · 14/01/2023 16:54

I think the recovery time also depends on the reason for the operation. My son was constantly unwell with tonsillitis and they were always sore and inflamed. He took a while to recover. My DD had the same issues as your son, she had no tonsillitis, and recovered incredibly quickly.

lucea87 · 14/01/2023 16:56

I had mine out at 17, I second what others have said in terms of the pain, it was horrendous. The first few days/week was the worst. I lost a stone in 3 days. I did my driving test 10 days after though. I wasn't 100% for several weeks but back at school within 2 weeks. It will be horrible, but worth it.

Zombiemum1946 · 14/01/2023 17:22

Recovery is normally 2 weeks. General rule of thumb is the older you are the more it hurts. Encouraging him to eat helps to prevent infection, soft food is fine it's the swallowing action that's helpful in preventing infection and post op bleeds. Regular pain meds around 20 mins before eating makes it more comfortable. Don't wait till the pain hits before taking the meds.
The consultant should go over the risks etc with you both.

Boswellonthesteps · 14/01/2023 17:42

I had mine taken out when I was 19. I had it done on the NHS but in a private hospital, I stayed overnight. I took 2 weeks off as advised, but ended up taking another week off as well. I was absolutely wiped out, the pain was excruciating and it was really hard to get any sleep. But having said that, I absolutely would make the same decision again as it was so worth it. It is a lot of pain, but it’s so much better than constantly getting ill

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