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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not want to spend christmas with anyone?

5 replies

ChatterMonkey · 02/12/2022 19:08

Well not just on my own, it's me and dp who dont want to go anywhere for christmas.

We always used to go to DPs mums for christmas dinner (mine are too far away andive very remote so weather makes it difficult to go in winter) but mil died 2 years ago in January and since then weve just done christmas ourselves.

It was easier to justify when it was covid times to just stay ourselves, but this year mil's bereaved partner has invited us (not dp's dad but as good as, he has no contact with his actual dad) as he'll be doing christmas with his sister, and bil has also invited us.

I think going to fil (using fil to keep it short!) Would be a bit too raw as it would be the same house we used to go to when mil was alive, and bil has 4 feral kids so as we are childless by choice at the moment, it seems a bit chaotic...

We are happy sorting food ourselves and just getting drunk on xmas day, but it seems everyone is feeling sorry for us and giving us pity invites...!

AIBU to turn down all the invites and stick to staying home and drinking champagne on christmas day??

OP posts:
Muddywaters1 · 02/12/2022 19:15

No, you do you. But considering it hasn't been horrible weather at Christmas for a decade, unless they live that far away, could you not try your folks one year?

ChatterMonkey · 02/12/2022 19:17

@Muddywaters1 they live on an island that relies on a small aircraft or unpredictable ferry... think orkney islands but not there to try and stay a bit anonymous..! We're seeing them this weekend in a middle ground location to do our 'christmas' I got stuck at home in the summer due to the weather which left me pretty unpopular at work so try to avoid if at all possible in winter!

OP posts:
Muddywaters1 · 02/12/2022 19:23

ChatterMonkey · 02/12/2022 19:17

@Muddywaters1 they live on an island that relies on a small aircraft or unpredictable ferry... think orkney islands but not there to try and stay a bit anonymous..! We're seeing them this weekend in a middle ground location to do our 'christmas' I got stuck at home in the summer due to the weather which left me pretty unpopular at work so try to avoid if at all possible in winter!

Aah, ok, that makes sense. Definitely stay home and get drunk then ❤️

ChatterMonkey · 03/12/2022 08:15

Im glad people seem to be agreeing with me, was starting to doubt myself for a minute!

OP posts:
JenniferWooley · 03/12/2022 08:53

That sounds fab OP! But people for some reason think you must spend Christmas with other people.

One year all my kids were elsewhere & I thought great, I'll get some loads of wine & treats in, order Chinese food & watch crappy Christmas movies all day. As soon as I mentioned this was my plan to anyone I got "oh you can't be on your own on Christmas Day, you must come to us".

I eventually gave in & went to my best friends for dinner but do sometimes wish I'd stuck to my guns & next time the kids are all elsewhere for Christmas Day that's what I'll be doing.

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