@PoseyFlump I love dogs too but the thing about cats is that they really do choose you. Our (not our cat) turned up in our garden just after DH died and made a beeline for DD who was quite young at the time. She slept on her bed, although was very timid for a year or so, seemed to have a connection with DD which as her dad had just died was really special. She was timid in lots of ways (although was spayed and obviously was not a stray) which makes me think she left a home she was mistreated in. I remember her reaction at a loud noise when I dropped something when she had decided to stay with us which was a bit out of proportion. She also hates men (none in this house so she rarely encounters them)- so suspect there had been some abuse. She soooooo rules this house now and I think is comfortable with us it is easy to forget the early days and how lucky we are to have her trust.