Childcare fallen through so can’t make DB’s child free wedding

[LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet]

My brother lives 350 miles away and is getting married tomorrow. Children aren’t invited - it’s been a nightmare trying to organise childcare for 3 full days (have to stay at least 2 nights because of distance) for my 2 kids in the summer holidays but we roped in BIL and SIL who thankfully had the days free and veryl kindly agreed to have them.

BIL found out yesterday that he has COVID! So we not can’t send them. He’s quite unwell with it as well apparently.

I told my brother today that we can’t come as we just cannot find anyone else at short notice to look after the kids for 2 nights. It’s a big ask of anyone!

He’s really pissed off with me and has asked if I can send them anyway as isolation rules etc are essentially redundant now. I’ve said no I’m it asking them to do that. Especially because we go on holiday next week and don’t want the kids taking COVID to Turkey with them. Was IBU to say no? I think if you ask people to make a 700 mile round trip for their wedding without their kids being invited you risk things falling through and this happening

^^ see!

Hire an automatic drive up the day before leave say 11pm on the wedding day and drive back. You could also leave at 5am undressed and finish getting ready at the venue.

I've driven over night before so we arrived on the day of the event, slept a bit the day before but just treat it as a nightshift at work. DH and DS slept in the car.

Anyone else longing for this to teach 1,000 posts just so we don’t keep circling the same drain? 😆

@LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet no not at all. You're deliberately misunderstanding me now. I wasn't expecting you to take the overnight Dublin's flight . I'm asking why you ever looked at a flight (not knowing at the time what flights were available) when what you DID know was that all flights ended in Inverness so NO flights were ever an option. You'd already stated a train to Inverness wasn't an option as you couldn't complete the onward journey. A question lve fairly clearly worded many ways now but you've still been unable to answer.

She replied to that I think? Someone could give her a lift tonight but not back to the station after the wedding.

But.. But.. OP didn't post to ask for options. People seem to keep mentioning this. She asked if she was BU to not go given the situation, not how she could get there by spending a lot more money and making awkward travel arrangements.

So you agree there’s no options but you’re berating me for not taking any options…the options that aren’t there What’s your deal?!

If your Brother wants you there, the invitation needs to accommodate the fact you have kids and no childcare. It's his restrictions that mean you can't attend, not the choices you are making.

I'm just hoping someone suggests getting the train before that point, now that might work...

😆

On the bright side op, if you read this whole thread, when your brother and his wife get pissed off at you and don’t believe you made an effort to get to their wedding, you can think you know what? You are really selfish thoughtless fuckers with your children wedding that you think I absolutely have to come to without my dc no matter what, but you do not hold a candle to the level of batshit displayed by half of mumsnet here. If that’s any consolation. I have more thoughts, but my brother is getting married in a month in a tiny ravine town in a mountain range accessible only by parachute on days when the wind is just right and I need to go camp with my broken leg on a nearby peak from tomorrow night to be confident of getting some suitable winds in time to get to the wedding. I’ve left my young dc on some nearby peaks, separate peaks each as the sherpas (who are complete strangers and don’t speak English) won’t look after more than one child per mountain peak.

@liveforsummer give it a rest. The OP is not required to answer your question. I suspect it is not being answered as it is is entirely irrelevant to the thread and you are just making yourself sound obsessed with the OP now.

Absolute batshit crazy loons are still pestering the OP.
For fuck sake give up and leave her alone

I can’t drive and even if I could I would NOT drive having had no sleep in 24 hours or so

Has anyone suggested an e-scooter yet?

I mean, it would be illegal, but if you really loved your brother . . .

@Endlesslypatient82 You said the OP 'insists there are no options' worded very nastily to imply there were options...Now you agree there are no options and your issue is with the wording of her OP and the fact that she even posted in the first place?

Honestly, give over!

This. Or you go alone. Way better than a no show

You're perfectly reasonable not to go. Of course it's possible... but I wouldn't personally put myself out that much(time consuming, expensive etc). I agree it's a problem of his own making. Ignore the goady posters. There's always a couple.

Surely the only possible way to get there is ny jetpack!!

I agree with this sentiment. My dd aged 6 slept round a friend’s house. The friend and dd couldn’t sleep so the girl’s parents took their dd into bed with them at about 1.30 am and left my dd alone in the girl’s bedroom. I’d given dd a phone to call me if she needed me and she was scared and in tears at 6am the next day.

In a similar situation when dd and a friend were about 7, we put a pop up tent in my bedroom and I read to them until they fell they asleep inside that. But we are not all the same and we have no clue how a young child or other adults will act/react in this situation. It is sometimes necessary to put children in such an environment eg when they go to a foster home or when children were evacuated but not for a family wedding.

It never occurred to you that, somewhere within the 900-odd posts, this might just have been mentioned?

no sleep in 24 hours or so

And yet another one....keep em coming OP. Better get some rest then, you've been on here ages.

Fascinating family dynamic from your brother and mum.
His sister must come.
His sister's children must not come.
His brother must not come.

It's almost like sabotage. Setting everyone up to get it wrong.

Those of you insisting the OP should go, did you have child-free weddings in hard-to-access places?

You can have any wedding you want, but if you want everyone you love to be there, it's probably a good idea not to make it very difficult, then sulk about it when people can't come.

READ THE OP'S POSTS FFS! NEITHER OF THESE OPTIONS ARE POSSIBLE!

AAAAARGH!!!!#!#!

But that’s what the quoted post is suggestion - get up at 5, drive 7 hours, leave at 11pm, drive 7 hours?