'between me and you' means nothing!

[Floating101]

Saying 'between me and you' before divulging some kind of news/gossip and the other person saying something like, 'oh of course' actually doesn't mean a thing - or is it me? Office gossip scenario, I've had this said to me several times and I've said it to others too when talking about situations - then find everyone seems to know/has found out about it anyway! A particular incident - I told only one person about ('between me and you' in place), then find various others know of it. I suppose if everyone is saying 'between me and you' before saying it, this is how it happens. From now on I shall say nothing! ...although, just between me and you....

This is completely normal in my workplace. Pretty much anything interesting is an open secret.

I think it's just a verbal phrase people use to signify that the thing they're saying is aimed at the other person rather than to a bigger group. Like you're sharing something you wouldn't share with everything. It really isn't a formal extrication of a promise that the other person won't tell another soul.

If I ever want to say something that I don't want to go elsewhere I'll make a point of saying 'please don't pass this on, but...', with the full knowledge I have no say or control over whether it gets passed on! Also I wouldn't trust random colleagues in the way I would a best friend.

I think "between you and me" indicates a bit of juicy gossip, that might not be common knowledge but certainly isn't secret. TBH I'd assume anyone who is educated it was spreading gossip unkindly.

If someone comes to me with a genuine secret they want to share/get off their chest, I'd expect them to be much more e explicit