To think if you do this you deserve every misfortune in life

[CanYouPLEASEStop]

If you scrape your teeth along your fork when you're eating like my DH?

Wanker.

Sort of light-hearted but mainly not.

Or when they scrape cutlery across the plate and it makes the god awful screech. I'm totally with you 😆

I couldn’t stand that.
He needs to stop that right now.

Cutlery scraping together, cutlery against the plate are bad enough but against his teeth?
Unbearable.

The worst part is he thinks it's NORMAL.

Who have I married.

Slurping is just as bad!

It is NOT normal.

What a monster.

stab him with your fork every time he does it

Gah, this post should have had a trigger warning. I'll have to try and unthink teeth scraping all morning now.

While I agree this is unacceptable, I think that you don't actually know how lucky you are!

Try living with someone who has porridge (🤮)for breakfast every morning, and emits that claggy wet sound and let's his jaws bang together!!!!!

It's not something I have ever noticed

why would someone do that? what benefit could it possibly entail except driving other people in the room mad?
you have to find out OP. ask him what he's trying to achieve here

This is your life now!

Or when they 'clang' their fork against their teeth!!!😡

He's an ex🎇🎇🎇🎇🎇🎇🎇

OP you just reminded me of some stuff that came out in an argument I had with a uni flatmate years ago. I mentioned the fact she licked every finger after every crisp and she got me back with how I bite my fork.

Obviously some deep seated issues there

I raise you a clicky jaw open mouth chewy, squishy, crunchy echo chamber punctuated with gasps of breath.

Soup.

I have to leave the room when my beloved eats soup. The slurping makes me want to tell him to gather up all worldly possessions and take himself as far away from me as humanly possible.

Oh dear God!