DH rearranging the furniture

penneforyourthoughts · 2022-06-21T12:51:51+00:00

AIBU for being pissed off that DH has taken it upon himself to rearrange the furniture in our kitchen / diner without asking me? Just that really. He is a stay at home dad so he's at home more than me and yesterday, he rearranged the furniture so the layout is totally different. He thinks it's better. I don't and I'm feeling moody about it.

Finfintytint · 21/06/2022 13:54

Test the new layout for a while and if it doesn’t work, switch it back.

JuneJubilee · 21/06/2022 13:55

YANBU

Its not on to change the layout, without discussing it, unless you have a partner that doesn't give a shit. Or unless you're happy to put it back if the other person doesn't like it.

coukd you agree to 'trial' it for a fortnight & if you still don't like it, swap it back together. Surely he doesn't think it's just his choice?

MeltorFreeze · 21/06/2022 13:55

Oh. I'm a sahm and I'm going to rearrange some stuff tomorrow. Didn't occur to me to mention it to DH. It's not furniture on his side of the room! I also have the kitchen set out how I think is logical, much to the disgust of DH who cooks one a week tops and uses stuff I never use, and moans every time.

MeltorFreeze · 21/06/2022 13:56

PS I think you should try it for 2-3 weeks and if you still don't like it, talk about it.

TheSpottedZebra · 21/06/2022 13:58

Would you ask permission to move the furniture?

Anonymous48 · 21/06/2022 13:59

MeltorFreeze · 21/06/2022 13:55

Oh. I'm a sahm and I'm going to rearrange some stuff tomorrow. Didn't occur to me to mention it to DH. It's not furniture on his side of the room! I also have the kitchen set out how I think is logical, much to the disgust of DH who cooks one a week tops and uses stuff I never use, and moans every time.

His side of the room?

JuneJubilee · 21/06/2022 13:59

Except to say as he's the SAH, if it impacts his care if the children & doesn't impact you that much then it's more fair to let him it how it works best for him.

orwellwasright · 21/06/2022 13:59

He likes it better this way. You like it better that way.

Who uses the room the most? If it's him, then logically it's his call.

orwellwasright · 21/06/2022 14:03

Anonymous48 · 21/06/2022 13:59

His side of the room?

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Don't you have your own side? I thought all couples did this. It works well although we've had to install two loos in the bathroom because I was fed up with the OH shitting in the shower cubicle (his side).

And me having to wash using loo water wasn't much fun either tbf.

luxxlisbon · 21/06/2022 14:05

It never occurred to me to ask permission from my partner to move a few bits of furniture around! Being pissed off and moody about it is an overreaction imo.
Its just furniture, why not try it out the other way around?
If you like it the existing way then it’s been ‘your’ way for however long, time to try his way.
Plus if he is at home in impacts his day to day much more than yours.

Anonymous48 · 21/06/2022 14:07

orwellwasright · 21/06/2022 14:03

Don't you have your own side? I thought all couples did this. It works well although we've had to install two loos in the bathroom because I was fed up with the OH shitting in the shower cubicle (his side).

And me having to wash using loo water wasn't much fun either tbf.

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Are you serious? No, all couples don't do this. I have my own side of the bed. I even have the side of the sofa I usually sit on. We have 2 sinks in our bathroom. I use one and he uses the other. But apart from that, our rooms don't have sides.

Hoppinggreen · 21/06/2022 14:08

orwellwasright · 21/06/2022 14:03

Don't you have your own side? I thought all couples did this. It works well although we've had to install two loos in the bathroom because I was fed up with the OH shitting in the shower cubicle (his side).

And me having to wash using loo water wasn't much fun either tbf.

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so many questions

MeltorFreeze · 21/06/2022 14:09

Don't you have your own side? I thought all couples did this
Me too! He made me switch sides when we moved house so I was closer to the door so he wouldn't get disturbed if the DC came in. ( not still bitter, swear!). "His side" has his bedside table and "my side" has my bedside table and a chest of drawers we both use 🤷‍♀️ I'm not moving any of his stuff significantly, so I won't be asking permission. That's just weird.

Anonymous48 · 21/06/2022 14:09

@orwellwasright

"...I was fed up with the OH shitting in the shower cubicle (his side).
And me having to wash using loo water wasn't much fun either tbf."

I'm not sure how I missed this before. Now I know you're trying to be funny.

LordEmsworth · 21/06/2022 14:10

I was fed up with the OH shitting in the shower cubicle

Err what the actual fuck?!

Anonymous48 · 21/06/2022 14:11

MeltorFreeze · 21/06/2022 14:09

Don't you have your own side? I thought all couples did this
Me too! He made me switch sides when we moved house so I was closer to the door so he wouldn't get disturbed if the DC came in. ( not still bitter, swear!). "His side" has his bedside table and "my side" has my bedside table and a chest of drawers we both use 🤷‍♀️ I'm not moving any of his stuff significantly, so I won't be asking permission. That's just weird.

Are you talking about your side of the bed? I mean, I think that's pretty normal. But I don't think most couples have their own sides of the kitchen, for example.

RJnomore1 · 21/06/2022 14:11

Anonymous48 · 21/06/2022 14:07

Are you serious? No, all couples don't do this. I have my own side of the bed. I even have the side of the sofa I usually sit on. We have 2 sinks in our bathroom. I use one and he uses the other. But apart from that, our rooms don't have sides.

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OMG 😂

Littlebirdyouaresosweet · 21/06/2022 14:12

Is that the poster who's dh and her have chosen decor and accessories for different rooms in their home?

luxxlisbon · 21/06/2022 14:13

It’s baffling how many posters can’t pick up on a joke.

xogossipgirlxo · 21/06/2022 14:14

LordEmsworth · 21/06/2022 14:10

I was fed up with the OH shitting in the shower cubicle

Err what the actual fuck?!

I think it was ironic.

Applesandroses · 21/06/2022 14:14

I move furniture around all the time, wouldn't occur to me to ask my DH first, although if he really didnt like something I would probably move it back

He does most of the cooking though so I don't rearrange things in the kitchen even though the way he has some stuff arranged is blatantly illogical and drives me mad

The cat however hates things moving, and gets very very grumpy about it. I threw a box away yesterday, it has only been there for a couple of days but even so she has taken me to the spot twice since I have thrown it away to meow mournfully at me. I'm not sure she will ever forgive me for getting rid of the old sofa....

SomePosters · 21/06/2022 14:18

If he is the stay a home parent he should get to make the house work for him as he needs to do so effectively as long as it doesn’t have huge negative impact you should manage round his and the kids needs

if you found coming home to it discombobulating ask him to text to warn you in future

Badger1970 · 21/06/2022 14:23

DH had a rare day off once and decided to reorganise all the kitchen cupboards. Bearing in mind I'm the cook, and never him. He burns water.

It all went back again at speed when I pointed out that as he'd arranged it for him to use, I'd happily hand the job over to him

Person who uses the room most gets to decide in my view.

orwellwasright · 21/06/2022 14:24

Anonymous48 · 21/06/2022 14:09

@orwellwasright

"...I was fed up with the OH shitting in the shower cubicle (his side).
And me having to wash using loo water wasn't much fun either tbf."

I'm not sure how I missed this before. Now I know you're trying to be funny.

😉

wordlewordle · 21/06/2022 15:54

I regularly move stuff around to try out different layouts and it wouldn't occur to me to ask DH (unless I need his help )