To ask for police warning instead of Non Molestation Order or Stalking Protection Order

[ritala]

Ex partner has been sending me 'gifts' in the post for six months or so. Every few weeks either letters/flowers/perfume/Chocs etc arrive. I have told him to stop but he has carried on.

I have had mixed reactions from the police.

When I first phoned to log it, the two male officers were very sympathetic and said that I was being harassed, I am a victim and there are things that can be done (NMO or SPO). They also said about a caution.

I chose to do nothing as I hoped it would stop but wanted it reported. I started taking photos of the deliveries before destroying them in case I need to use them as evidence.

The second time I got the police involved, the female officer was again sympathetic but suggested a caution, definitely not an NMO as that is for violent crimes only. Again, stupidly, I just wanted it logged and thought it would be over.

Anyway, it isn't. The third time I phoned, it was two young male officers who first suggested I should text him again to say stop sending me stuff and also said if I wanted to do anything then it would have to be an NMO as they don't issue PINs (a warning that isn't logged on Grimaldi record) or unofficial warnings or anything.

I'm worried because I want it all to stop but scared that if he is issued with SPO or NMO (even though I don't think this would be granted as he hasn't been violent nor threatened violence) then I will have to go to court. Is that would might happen?

I have also thought about arranging a cease and desist letter to be sent to him saying something like "stop what you're doing or the next time you will be issued with an official order".

I have a case worker from Paladin calling me later today but just wondered if anyone had any wise words or experience with stalking, c&d letters, STO or NMO.

I really want action to be taken this time but unsure of the route to take.

Thanks all

You want it to stop, but you won't do anything about it? Presumably you are expecting your ex to read your mind?

Just get the NMO. He clearly isn't a reasonable person, so there's no point sitting quietly and hoping he will suddenly become reasonable. Talk to the Paladin adviser,and see what they say, but I would be asking for the NMO, with a power of arrest attached if possible (I think it is possible).

Thanks, yes I spoke to them and we are going down the SPO route now. There is plenty of evidence.

Well it’s harassment and he can be arrested, go to court and be issued with a restraining order (in E&W UK). But yes you may have to go to court to provide the evidence if he contests it.

the NMO and SPO are civil orders with power of arrest.
he can only get a caution if he admits the offence.