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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think what were the chances?

25 replies

EzzieB · 13/03/2022 19:38

I last slept with my ex two weeks ago. He's a piece of work and ended up blocking me on SM.

50 miles from home and I bumped into him with a lady friend who is obviously more than a friend. I don't know who was more shocked but all I could mutter was, "You've moved on quickly, Dan".

This man was the love of my life for a decade until we broke up four years back. He turned into a selfish knob and still is which is why a few weeks back I told him some truths about his behaviour which lead to him blocking me. I'm so sad 😢

OP posts:
Original poster
EzzieB · 13/03/2022 19:39

When we slept together a few weeks back it was very romantic and we were in the same location that I bumped into him 50 miles from home. My life is a mess.

OP posts:
Whitefire · 13/03/2022 19:47

I mean this with kindness, but it is probably for the best that he has blocked you. You said yourself he is a selfish knob so ask yourself why you want to be a part of that. I'm guessing for the past four years he has had you dangling by a string, these are his true colours. You are worth more than that. You will never heal whilst he is in the background.

Today is the start of a new chapter. You can be in control from here.

Eucalyptusbee · 13/03/2022 19:48

Yes agree see this as a second chance. The universe has intervened to open your eyes to his true self. You will be better for it, without him draining your time and your energy. Good luck Daffodil

Faevern · 13/03/2022 19:50

Moved on quickly? It’s been four years. I agree let this be your new start.

Unsureaboutit9 · 13/03/2022 19:52

Moved on quickly? It’s been 4 years OP! And your casual sex clearly wasn’t leading to another relationship. He’s blocked you and he sounds like a total idiot, you’ve had a lucky escape here OP. Hopefully things better for you from here

LIZS · 13/03/2022 19:54

Seems doubtful he was not already with his current gf a few weeks back. See him for the selfish twat he really is and wish her luck, she might just need it.

Original poster
EzzieB · 13/03/2022 20:05

We didn't speak for the four years we have been broken up until about 3 or 4 weeks back we started talking again. Everything was lovely until he started with his old ways and showing the true colours I finished with him for four years ago.

OP posts:
AHungryCaterpillar · 13/03/2022 20:08

Why did you start speaking again after 4 years?

Justheretoseemnormal · 13/03/2022 20:15

Ex's are ex's for a reason
Never go back!!

Dust off and chin up.
You've got this

Original poster
EzzieB · 13/03/2022 20:17

@AHungryCaterpillar we just starting talking on social media one day instigated by him.

OP posts:
MarthaFokker · 13/03/2022 20:18

It was just casual sex though. I'm not sure there's anything to 'move on quickly' from?

It sounds as though you two are completely incompatible, so you're best off apart.

100problems · 13/03/2022 20:24

I suspect the lady friend has more to worry about in this situation.

Original poster
EzzieB · 13/03/2022 20:33

It wasn't just casual sex though. He wanted us to get back together but I was hesitant because of how things were previously.

OP posts:
Original poster
EzzieB · 13/03/2022 20:35

@100problems. She does.

I've heard he took her to the restaurant we were supposed to be going to. It was booked for us but then it went awry between us.

OP posts:
Original poster
EzzieB · 13/03/2022 20:36

I do regret opening my mouth now. It would've been more dignified to walk past in icy silence.

OP posts:
tkwal · 13/03/2022 20:44

He's a user and this is your chance to get him out of your head, and your life forever. He has reminded you of why your relationship ended and he's not going to change now. I just hope your contraception was foolproof

Original poster
EzzieB · 13/03/2022 20:46

Yes contraception was used.

OP posts:
ImInStealthMode · 13/03/2022 20:55

I'm confused. Does he live in the place 50 miles from your home? Was there a reason you were back there, near a restaurant you were supposed to have been going to with him, on the day you were supposed to have been going?

Seems like an enormous coincidence.

Original poster
EzzieB · 13/03/2022 21:02

@iminstealthose I had booked and paid for a holiday home for a night for us before we had our 'to do' and couldn't get a refund, so of course I was going to still stay, albeit alone. I didnt expect to see him in town though.

OP posts:
MarthaFokker · 13/03/2022 21:51

@EzzieB

It wasn't just casual sex though. He wanted us to get back together but I was hesitant because of how things were previously.
Yes but then you had a go at him and he blocked you, so why wouldn't he 'move on' as you put it? I'm not sure what else you expected?
goldenbag · 13/03/2022 22:25

So he happened to be in the holiday home location with a date?! How does that work?

Faevern · 14/03/2022 00:18

So you got back together a few weeks ago and then planned a restaurant and room 50 miles away. Then you argued and you went to the hotel and he took another woman to the restaurant and you bumped into each other?

Original poster
EzzieB · 14/03/2022 07:37

@faeven yes, that's right. I'm staying at the accommodation and he decided to still come and stay elsewhere with his new woman and take her to the restaurant we were due to go to.

He can obviously move on as he likes but will the ten years together we have and us last spending time and sleeping together just two weeks ago, I feel it's in bad taste he's taking some other woman out so soon and no doubt shagging her. He quickly forgot about me!

OP posts:
Original poster
EzzieB · 14/03/2022 07:39

Oh and the place he's staying with her is the place we stayed together two weeks back!

OP posts:
Unsureaboutit9 · 14/03/2022 17:36

@EzzieB

Oh and the place he's staying with her is the place we stayed together two weeks back!
How do you no were they are staying and eating after just bumping into them in the street? You seriously need to take a step back OP, he’s a waste of space but you are obsessing way way too much about it, it’s been 4 years, and then a brief mistake. He’s entitled to do whatever he wants, with whoever he wants. You arnt going to find happiness near this guy
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