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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

UTI in toddler - nursery at fault?

41 replies

Maddylee · 26/11/2021 23:30

My daughter is currently being treated for the 2nd UTI in 3 months. The first urine sample showed something but was inconclusive but she was still treated with antibiotics. This week she came home on evening and it was evident the nursery had not supervised her during toilet time. From the next mornings she was in pain when going to the bathroom and going every 20mins.
She’s 3 but I feel there is some part of negligence from the nursery here and I am very upset and disappointed as well as petrified this will happen again and cause some long term damage. Has anyone else had experience of this?

OP posts:
Lemonlady22 · 26/11/2021 23:33

How is this the nursery's fault...I don't understand. Take her back to GP

GenandaThirty · 26/11/2021 23:34

Well you should see what causes it.

StillMedusa · 26/11/2021 23:35

How exactly are you equating your dd getting UTIs with it being Nursery's fault?! Some little girls are prone to UTIs unfortunately due to anatomy ( I have a couple of friends whose children needed a prophalactic low dose antibiotic every day until they were about 7 or 8) Probably they should encourage her to drink plenty (but you can't force a child!) and encourage her to wipe (are they allowed to do that themselves these days?) but blaming them is ridiculous!
What do you do at home that is so different that they are causing UTIs... ?!

Bunnycat101 · 26/11/2021 23:36

I think you’re being unreasonable to put this at the door of nursery unless you think they’re care is lacking anyway. I little one had a bad, hospital requiring UTI as a baby when I would have been in sole charge. I was not negligent in my care in any way. These things happen and a 3yo newly potty trained child is probably at their most vulnerable to issues re hygiene but some people are more prone.

iklboo · 26/11/2021 23:37

Eh? This is the nursery's fault why?

purpleme12 · 26/11/2021 23:38

What are they doing to cause the UTI?

HP87 · 26/11/2021 23:39

My daughter had 3 utis in a short space of time when she was 3. Kidney scan wad clear, the consultant made it clear to me that she wasn't drinking enough. She should be drinking 1 litre a day and going to the toilet roughly 6 times a day. She's six now and she's had none since. I was unaware how little she was drinking to be honest!

Thehogfatherstolemycurry · 26/11/2021 23:40

If she's 3 I assume she's in preschool? If that's the case it's unlikely they'll be supervising her toileting as she should be being taught independence.
Not sure how getting a uti is nurseries fault?

Dogknowsbest · 26/11/2021 23:43

Not being funny but if your kid is toilet trained it can't really be the nursery's fault if she gets a UTI. I don't know how you would go about proving that the nursery had breached their duty of care in this case either. It just seems a bit remote.

MindyStClaire · 26/11/2021 23:50

I presume OP means that she hadn't wiped properly after a poo. In which case just tell the nursery that she still needs a bit of help with that and tell your DD to tell an adult when she goes.

Original poster
Maddylee · 26/11/2021 23:57

Yes exactly @mindyStClaire
It was evident she hadn’t been wiped properly when she came home and I put her in the bath.
At home I still wipe her and there has never been any incidents of UTIs. They are now letting her go into the preschool room when she’s not been actually officially moved into that room. She doesn’t start school for another 2 years and yes, still needs assistance in the bathroom.
They have had a lot of staff leave recently yet no new starters so I am concerned that there is not enough staff and corners are being cut.

OP posts:
2pinkginsplease · 27/11/2021 00:10

As an early years practitioners we stand near the bathroom door( mainly to make sure there is no carry on) , we don’t wipe for a pee but will help if they have done a poo.

I’m not sure how it can be the nurseries fault, we have 2 year olds that can wipe after a pee perfectly well, as a parent it’s my duty to teach my child how to do this properly.

I’d look at her fluid intake which could be the problem.

RedWingBoots · 27/11/2021 00:27

At home I still wipe her and there has never been any incidents of UTIs.

Childcare environments aren't home.

If your child is toilet trained then you need to tell her to tell an adult when she has done a poo. (Often they sound like they are pooing when they are just weeing and vice versa).

If you have a reasonably independent 3 year old they often won't say they have done a poo as they want to get back to playing.

I have to deal with my 3 year old not wiping properly and so spend ages at home teaching her to wipe and wash her hands as she will just take herself to the toilet or potty.

Also if there wasn't enough staff they would close down or turn some children away. They are probably using some agency staff.

JustLikea · 27/11/2021 00:30

Is this another wind up thread

You wouldn't wipe your DC once they're out of nappies they do that themselves Confused

Original poster
Maddylee · 27/11/2021 00:32

Why would I not wipe my child’s bin just because they are out of nappies??? And no it isn’t a wind up thread but Thankyou everyone for your support. Knew I could trust on mumsnet to make me worse than I steady do.

OP posts:
wandawaves · 27/11/2021 00:39

I understand what you're saying OP about poor hygiene potentially causing the UTI's.
I think the best thing to do from here is to teach your child at home how to wipe hygienically. Stop doing it for her, teach her how to wipe front to back, get fresh toilet paper for each wipe if needed. Hand hygiene etc.

lynntheyresexpeople · 27/11/2021 00:48

No, it's nothing to do with nursery. Teach her about wiping, thoroughly as pp suggested. There's no negligence involved.

HelloDaisy · 27/11/2021 00:49

My dd had uti a few times at that age mainly due to not drinking enough. Once we had to take her to a&e as I couldn’t even get her to sit on the toilet due to pain.

Once we had sorted out a routine to get her to drink enough it was fine and don’t happen again. Perhaps ask the nursery to monitor how much she drinks and let you know on pick so you can record the full day and see how you get on..

50ShadesOfCatholic · 27/11/2021 00:54

Maybe she needs time away from nursery until you are confident she is wiping herself correctly. Everyone's anatomy is slightly different and your girl may be a bit unlucky and have to be extra careful.

UTIs can make you very sick so I understand why you feel worried.

I'd probably talk to nursery to see if they could support her around this, van only be helpful.

Summerfun54321 · 27/11/2021 01:05

Is poor wiping linked to UTIs? (asking as I genuinely didn’t know this). My DD is awful at wiping and needs a lot of supervision and help and but has never had a UTI.

RedWingBoots · 27/11/2021 01:09

@JustLikea

Is this another wind up thread

You wouldn't wipe your DC once they're out of nappies they do that themselves Confused

I wipe my DD who is 3.

But first I get her to do it herself.

She was potty trained at 2 and I initially wiped her as she couldn't. Now everyone is encouraging her to wipe herself.

WindyWindsor · 27/11/2021 01:10

@Summerfun54321

Is poor wiping linked to UTIs? (asking as I genuinely didn’t know this). My DD is awful at wiping and needs a lot of supervision and help and but has never had a UTI.
I think it's more to do with not wiping properly or correctly meaning bacteria can get to your urethra and cause UTIs. It's the same for adults as well, it's why they say you should wipe front to back.
RedWingBoots · 27/11/2021 01:12

@Summerfun54321

Is poor wiping linked to UTIs? (asking as I genuinely didn’t know this). My DD is awful at wiping and needs a lot of supervision and help and but has never had a UTI.
Yes.

That's why you teach girls to wipe "front to back"

However generally some women and girls are more at risk of getting UTIs than others. While good hygiene helps a lot, it is not known why some women and girls are more susceptible.

7eleven · 27/11/2021 01:16

Yes they are, Summer. Most UTIs are E.Coli infections, from faeces. The small distance between the anus and urethra is why women are so much more prone.

Justheretoaskaquestion91 · 27/11/2021 02:17

Please get her kidneys checked. There’s a condition that’s called vesicoureteric reflux (I had it and so did my son) and it can cause repeat UTIs and quite a lot of problems. For some reason people don’t know about it but it’s not uncommon, particularly in girls.

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