Pub after work…

[Hownowbrowncow1]

Long thread and sorry for the first world problems…

Partner runs own business in building trade, finishes between 4-6 most days. One day a week him and one of the other blokes who he’s good friends with go to the local, have 2 pints and come home so he’s there no longer than an hour. Gets on with owners and locals and has become a regular in there.

Now sometimes this happens an extra couple of times through the week, if they finish early or some reason or other.. again in there no longer than an hour and he’s back to help with tea etc.

We have 2 DC (6 and 1) who are relatively easy and I’m still on mat leave so I can do picks up for school and football clubs for older DC.

The thing that annoys me is why does he not feel the need to just come home and be with us? Today he’s been at work and instead of just coming home he’s popped to the pub for a “quick one” he always says about he can’t wait to come
Home to us be in our happy place etc etc so I just don’t get it. I’ve mentioned it before and said look I honestly don’t mind the once a week but multiple times is just annoying. And he said he’s keep to the once a week.

For context I go out with my friends once/twice a month for a meal and we do other things during days off in the week, he will go on organised nights out for occasions won’t just go down the pub on a Friday for the night type of thing.

Am I turning into a crazy bunny boiler?!

I think that’s the main thing that I just want to offload onto him when he’s back after a long day😂 I’m probably a little jealous that he can avoid coming home straight away and can go straight from work instead of coming home then going back out

@DillonPathersTexas OP says it's more than once a week of late.

There's a bit of a culture of blokes doing the "pint after work" thing where I live and I do find it a bit if I'm honest. It's all a bit 1970s.

Plus, most of them are having way more than one or two pints.

I wouldn't get annoyed about it if its genuinely once a week.
If you're feeling jealous, then make the arrangements and take a night a week for yourself- yoga class, a new hobby, or even just a coffee with a friend/glass of wine.

PuppyMonkey

OP states is mostly once a week with the occasional two times a week. She also states it's a couple of pints and no longer then an hour. Fair enough if he is neglecting his family duties but spend every evening down the boozer before rolling in late doors absolutely pissed but what he is doing is hardly terrible.

Now sometimes this happens an extra couple of times through the week,

I took that to mean extra couple of times in addition to the usual one night he was doing before.

@Hownowbrowncow1

I think that’s the main thing that I just want to offload onto him when he’s back after a long day😂 I’m probably a little jealous that he can avoid coming home straight away and can go straight from work instead of coming home then going back out

He probably needs a couple of pints if you immediately off load into him as soon as he walks through the door ! Seriously though, I really don't think he's doing anything wrong if it's really just a couple of pints a couple of times a week. Perhaps you need to find another outlet, and perhaps not be quite so needy for his company? I don't mean that as harshly as it might sound .

Yeah maybe, I think I focus so much on the DC’s being all sorted that I probably don’t bother taking abit more time for myself

I would say this is a cultural thing tbh.

Is he working class background?

My 2 brothers to the local pub every day after work. I don't know how my sil's put up with it.
My dad also went to the pub straight from work every day.