Now that Mick and Keef have (temporarily) retired this Stones classic from their playlist after 50 years of earning squillions in royalties from a ditty about slavery, rape, racism and sadism, I decided to start penning a new lyric.
After all, why waste one of the great guitar riffs in history? And many of us are greatly improving our baking skills during these Covid-restricted times, aren't we? (Disclosure: I'm in Melbourne, where we've been in strict lockdown since July and see no end to it; in fact, things are getting worse, so I need bickies.)
So, let us celebrate one of life's most delightful flavourings. Sticky Fingers, indeed. 
Golden syrup is a drop too sweet,
Slow molasses surely got me beat,
Can’t stand the cube stuff, it’s so eerie white,
Not when I’m baking just around midnight!
Arrrrgh, Brown Sugar!
How come you taste so good?
Arrrrgh, Brown Sugar!
Just like a sweet thing should!
Who'd like to write the next verse? Let us save this song in time for the Stones' US tour, seeing as the Stones seem unable to save it themselves.