"Hey summer, we're ready for you"

[StealthPolarBear]

What exactly is summer supposed to reply? And how?

"Nah I've decided to fuck off this year. Rain will keep you company instead"

"Already been, leave me alone"

“You know those two weeks back in June? That was me. I’m self-isolating now after a month in Ibiza, soz.”

"We are in Britain, what did you expect, sucker!"

“Lolz”

“I’m here, this is it. Enjoy.”

These are brilliant! It was more a whine about addressing a season, but I do like the fact you've all suggested replies :)

wait till the kids go back to school - then I'll scorch the shit out of everything until thunderstorms flood everything - then snow

Well you're going to feel pretty silly with your leg waxing, beach readiness and sitting in a cozzie then, because I have read those threads on here wailing when I turn up for more than two fecking days. It is not my fault you bought that new build, you were all "oooh look at the energy rating " while looking up briefly from your Christmas Bargain 1,457 thread.

You can all just do without me and see how that feels. It won't hurt as much as when you all go on and on and on about snuggling under blankets with hot sodding chocolate. What the feckity is wrong with ice cream???

A season has feelings too you know. Enjoy your soggy tents.

Flounce

:o