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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Where should I go!

7 replies

NatalieLou24 · 20/06/2021 20:28

Hi all,

Long time lurker, first time poster here.

I really need some advice, my husband is from a city abroad and we now live in London. We love our area and how vibrant London is but we now have kids and can barely afford rent on a two bed flat in a nice area let alone ever buy.

I am from Leicester and all my family still live there, I really want to move up to market Harborough, be close to family and also just an hour train ride from london for the days hubs has to commute on. We could afford to buy a small two bed house and also give my children the life I had as a kid, growing up with family nearby, having a garden to play in and a slower way of life. My husband think harbs isn't lively or multicultural enough, he wants to stay in a small flat in london just scrapping by. It's causing so many arguments and neither is happy. Am I being unreasonable pushing that we should move out?

Wwyd? If I stay in london to make him happy it means I don't give my kids the lifestyle I want plus my family aren't close by to spend time with. If I push Leicestershire I'm worried he'll be resentful and unhappy. He moved here to England to be with me so I feel obliged to be where he wants a little bit.

The middle ground (commuter towns outside of london) give us neither the space I need nor the vibrant lifestyle.

Any advise is welcomed? Feels like one of us will always "lose"

OP posts:
AlmostAJillSandwich · 20/06/2021 20:35

Whats best for the kids should be priority, thats having good family relations and security of an owned home.

NatalieLou24 · 20/06/2021 21:22

I want to add too that the "scrapping by" part is how I feel now and he think that's as he does better in his job we will end up having enough to live there but I need to put up with a few more years of us struggling financially.

OP posts:
NatalieLou24 · 20/06/2021 21:23

He thinks being in London is the best thing for the kids - having that much culture and best schools on your doors step etc

We totally disagree on what's important for our kids :(

OP posts:
PotassiumChloride · 20/06/2021 21:24

Is there a happy medium between Market Harborough and London? Leicester is a decent sized city and multi-cultural.

Skysblue · 21/06/2021 12:39

With that situation I’d do Cambridge personally. Multicultural, lively etc.

Skysblue · 21/06/2021 12:40

Ps I grew up in London and it isn’t a good place to grow up.

Nsky · 21/06/2021 12:44

I’m in Tonbridge, 40 mins to London, Sevenoaks 7 miles away, tho nearly as expensive as London, nice places fair bit going on.
Nice place to move to and good schools
And near M25, my brother lives in Lincoln 3.5 hrs away, not too far

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