Can anyone do this sum because I have given up

[TheMustressMhor]

Okay - so we are putting concrete slabs on a small area of the garden.

This measures 12 ft x 8 ft.

The slabs we have chosen measure 450mm x 450 mm.

My brain has fallen out trying to work out how many slabs we will need.

Even the woman in the shop got three different answers and eventually sold us 36 slabs.

I think 36 slabs is wrong.

But the fact that I am incapable of working this out is driving me mad. My brain has fallen out and I appeal to anyone who has any sense to tell me how many slabs we need.

TIA

This thread

I tried to work it out.

I have eleven different answers . . . .

I would imagine that B&Q have a lot of experience of amateur builders etc. coming back for more of whatever, so they just include the extra 10% from the off as they know the chances of it being required is higher than not.

12' x 8' = 3658 mm x 2438 mm

Google suggests spacing the slabs approx 10 mm apart.

The number of "spaces between the slabs" = (number of slabs - 1)

3858/450 = 8.13
3658 mm - (8 x 450 mm) = 58 mm
58 mm/(8-1) = approx 8 mm

So 8 slabs spaced 8 mm apart = 12'

2438/450 = 5.4
(5 x 450 mm) + (4 x 8 mm) = 2282 mm = approx 7' 6"

You've said you are having gravel at the edges, so if you don't mind the patio being 12' x 7'6", you need (8 x 5) slabs ie 40 slabs

If you want it to be exactly 12' x 8' you will need a line of partial slabs at one edge that are (2438 mm - 2282 mm - 8 mm) = 148 mm. In theory, you could get 3 partial slabs from one whole slab... So you need 8/3 extra slabs, which is 3 when rounded up to whole slabs. 43 slabs in total assuming no breakages.

'Paper slobs' - why not borrow some real ones as all slobs do is lie around and they won't get soggy in the rain.

It looks like it will be slobs tomorrow, not slabs.

The village is going to be battered by 80mph winds, according to DH.

Let's just see. I am not convinced.

Gravel it instead

Am in bed. OH is asleep next to me. He was snoring but my silent hysterics reading this thread has produced a rocking bed has stopped him. I've tried everything to shut him up in the past, who knew contained laughter would work so well.

Furthermore, I've just had 3 lots of emergency spinal surgery. Silent laughing and spinal surgery do not go together well. Now slightly concerned I've laughed another disc out...

Fucking brilliant thread OP

PS @TheMustressMhor did you have another thread recently dedicated solely to cooked eggs?!

Good morning RedDhalia - yes, the fried egg thread is mine.

I am getting a little tired of it as some people seem to have no sense of humour.

One intrepid poster even suggested that Mr. Mhor was a figment of my imagination.

He is actually in the kitchen as I type getting another breakfast ready for me to criticise.

@RedDhalia

Join us HERE for more on fried eggs and patios.

@TheMustressMhor

I have spent all day in A & E/ MRI scanner and I blame you and your thread entirely.

Luckily for you I don't require any further surgery, so I won't have to sue your ass off.

On another note I'm furious that I didn't read your posts this morning. I could have had a much better day had I found the new thread.

I found the egg one after I posted last night, amazing how some people can not fathom tone nor take a joke anymore.

I'm now off to peruse the other thread...

@RedDhalia

Jeepers. I thought you were joking about prolapsed discs.

Have some and an apology.

See you elsewhere.....

THE NUMBER OF SLABS DH USED WAS 47

Just in case anyone wants to know.

I will attach a picture when it is completed.

Thanks to all who made calculations even the incorrect ones