Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Blocked my dd iphone

50 replies

Imustbemad00 · 02/12/2019 22:58

I know iabu.
My DD misbehaved. I wanted to confiscate her phone, but need to call her and she needs the alarm so I changed the pin this morning.
I can’t remember it, it was something simple. No more than 2 digits used. She’s going to be furious. I’ve tried several and the phone is now disabled for an hour.
What do I do?????
I did something similar to her old phone with her screen time password. I’m literally dreading telling her. She’s 14 and hates me messing with her phone for this exact reason Sad

OP posts:
MyNewBearTotoro · 02/12/2019 23:01

If you can’t remember the passcode there’s nothing you can do. My phone will keep disabling for longer time periods and then eventually wipe itself if the wrong passcode is repeatedly used. Not all phones will wipe automatically but most will keep disabling at least - is it a 4-digit or 6-digit PIN?

Original poster
Imustbemad00 · 02/12/2019 23:58

6 digit. I’m kiterAlly scared to tell her.

OP posts:
greenlobster · 03/12/2019 00:25

If you really can't remember the passcode you'll have to wipe the iphone to get into it. If it's been backed up before you changed the passcode you'll be able to restore her data though.

In the long run you'd be better off buying a cheap nokia brick or something to swap her iphone for when you want to confiscate it.

TotalRecall · 03/12/2019 01:08

Well that was a silly thing to do. I’m pretty sure you can’t even wipe it without getting into it first like a PP said. iPhones are notoriously unhackable.

FelicityBeedle · 03/12/2019 01:29

Provided she’s synced it you can plug it into the computer with iTunes and restore to last backup

puds11 · 03/12/2019 01:36

Why are you scared of your daughter?

Floofboopsnootandbork · 03/12/2019 01:59

If she has find my phone installed then you can wipe it through the computer, I had to do it when I forgot my password a few months ago.

kisdenhus · 03/12/2019 02:00

You've buggered up here OP. Each time you put a wrong password in now it will just lock again for a longer period of time and then permanently.

Only way out is to completely reset it and then face the music with DD:

support.apple.com/en-us/HT204306

Timmytoo · 03/12/2019 02:07

Back it up on a desktop. Restore the download everything back onto it again

NearlyGranny · 03/12/2019 02:08

Get some rest, as you fall asleep, instruct your brain to retrieve the number. Then completely stop trying to remember, as you're only laying down false information over the true. Sounds crazy, I know, but it's your brain and that number is in there somewhere so it can be retrieved! You might wake up with it risen to the surface. Has to be worth a try.

In the end, this is all down to your daughter. Presumably you pay her contract, so it's not her phone, it's yours. You get to withhold it if you choose. Rather than caving, confessing and apologising, just tell her no phone for the rest of the week and that gives you time to sort it. You actually have all the power here; you're just not wielding it.

Why is your 14 year old scary? Does she throw tantrums or verbally abuse you or does it get physical? Is it time to stop trying to placate her and do some difficult parenting?

notangelinajolie · 03/12/2019 02:14

Take it to apple. Don't try any more numbers until then. And if they can't do it then you are buggered.

Purpleneonpinkunicorns · 03/12/2019 02:34

Hi op I would take the phone to a apple store and I would be making her go old school by buying her an alarm clock and a cheap shitty phone in what you could probably have an alarm set on it also.

You shouldn't be scared of your child no matter how old they are.

Justwondering605 · 03/12/2019 02:45

Bloody hell some people are so dramatic. OP didn't say she's scared of her daughter Hmm she said she's scared to tell her. You'd be nervous too if you'd made a mistake like that I'm sure, as the other person will be very upset and possibly lose all their data!
As a PP said, rest and try tomorrow. Write down all the possible combinations. If it's a 6 number passcode using 2 digits only, there won't be that many. Try them all and leave time for it to enable itself in between. I'm sure you'll find the answer!

Topseyt · 03/12/2019 02:51

Best not to change passcodes when you already have form for forgetting them. I'd be pretty annoyed with you too if I were your DD.

My DH once did that with a combination lock suitcase. It was an expensive one too that he had bought. He set the combination before he got home and by the time he was home he couldn't remember what it was. The case remained shut (empty, thankfully) and was never used.

Of course your DD shouldn't have misbehaved, and that is on her. All you had to do was take the phone though. Not fiddle faddle with it.

heartsonacake · 03/12/2019 03:40

Why on earth wouldn’t you write it down if you have form for this?

Shooturlocalmethdealer · 03/12/2019 04:00

The bigger question is why are you scared to tell your 14 yr old anything???

Greggers2017 · 03/12/2019 04:20

That poor girl. I'm sorry but at 14 she may have things special to her on there. Photos, memories, etc. My DD has all her homework in hers.
Why would you do that? I'd be massively pissed off too and think she has a right to be upset.
A phone is a lot to a 14 year old. If she's misbehaving why not just confiscate it and hide it?

jellycatspyjamas · 03/12/2019 04:28

You wouldn’t be anxious about telling someone you’d managed to lock their phone, which may need to be reset thus losing everything on it? I’d be bloody furious if someone did that to my phone, even allowing for her daughter’s poor behaviour, losing everything on your phone is a disproportionate punishment. I’m assuming the OP is talking about fearing for her life or thinking she’s in danger so much as being mortified about what she’s done and not wanting to upset her daughter.

OP I’d need to tell my DD about what’s happened and hope that I could fix it. Next time just take the phone.

Derbee · 03/12/2019 04:45

even allowing for her daughter’s poor behaviour, losing everything on your phone is a disproportionate punishment

OP, you’re an idiot, as you’ve done this before. All of her messages, all of her photos etc etc.

How ironic that in trying to teach a child that actions have consequences, you’ve done a practical demonstration of epic fucking proportions.

Can’t you try and learn this time, finally?

Aridane · 03/12/2019 04:48

Sounds like a good punishment (that went wrong). And as other pp have said, why are you scared of your child? Does she have a hurtful turn of phrase? or worse?

Aramox · 03/12/2019 05:13

Don’t keep trying or it will get permanently disabled. Do the method Apple advises, plugging into icloud- presumably it’s been backed up there.

Blondefancy · 03/12/2019 05:29

I could be wrong here but i don’t think it’s even possible to back up your iPhone to a pc/device without having your password first. It’ll ask you when you first plug it in for the passcode for safety reasons before connecting to said device, otherwise anyone could just come along and steal all your things without a passcode.
I would be FUUUUUURIOUS with you if you did that to me at age 14! Xmas Angry

BrokenWing · 03/12/2019 06:08

A quick Google on Apple shows what you can do, skim read and think you need a computer that the phone is synced to.

Butchyrestingface · 03/12/2019 06:35

I did something similar to her old phone with her screen time password

Do you mean you used the same punishment in the past and forgot the pin on that occasion too?

If so, for Christ’s sake woman. You want your kid to learn from her mistakes but you need to do that too. Either write the pin down or come up with a new punishment.

UnderHisEyeBall · 03/12/2019 06:41

Did you remember it OP?