...to ask how to get your mojo back/ the spark back (SEX)

[Spearshake]

Ok, I just added SEX in caps to get your attention. My libido has taken a downward turn (after having kids) and never quite picked up (the kids are 10 and 8 so I don't have the excuse of young babies, sleepless nights, etc). I was wondering if anyone had any success stories about how to get the spark back. Would a sex toy help? If so, which ones?? I've never had one so nothing too scary! I was thinking of exploring tantra yoga/sex (if I can get the images of Sting and Trudy out of my head) but not sure if I have the energy and time. I know - I am lazy. Also, not sure if I can persuade my cynical husband to try. Anyone got any sensible tips? Just to be clear - we do have sex; it's just that I never feel like initiating and I'm never really in the mood until we get down to it. It's all a bit of an effort. Anyone experienced the same and turned it all around??

Do you have time together as a couple and time away from the kids? I know the second one isn't always the easiest in terms of babysitters and finding the time but honestly, those two things make a big difference. IME it's the time together to reconnect away from the bedroom that helps you to reconnect in the bedroom.

Some of the things DH and I do are get up early at least once a week to have breakfast together while the DC are still asleep, a couple of times a week we have a late dinner just the two of us after the DC are in bed, he will take a half day if leave now and then and we go on a little day time date while the DC are at school/nursery, we book my mum months in advance for babysitting and go out-out.

I have recently purchased the love honey advent calendar in the hope of getting our sex life back. It hasn’t worked so far, it will be this time next year by the time we open all 25 doors 😂
Watching this thread in the hope of suggestions!