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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To have said no about this photo

19 replies

flashdancer19 · 05/08/2019 14:16

Have been away to a European city, sitting in the square yesterday evening and on a table was a man who looked like Gary Glitter (sorry don't know his real name). One of the group commented on this, in what I felt was a flippant manner, saying "oh look I must take a photo of him and said it to my friends, they'll laugh at that" ...... why is that even funny?l, the man is beyond vile!

Anyway a little later the same woman said my phones dead could I borrow someone else's to take a photo and they can send it to me. I thought she meant of our group, when she got the phone she went to take a photo of this man, on my phone!

I categorically told her to stop and said that it was wrong on many levels, not least because you can't just take photos of strangers to ridicule or laugh at them.

She had a go at me, saying don't be so sensitive, touchy etc. The group said nothing.

Was IBU to say no, I would not be part of that?

OP posts:
RickJames · 05/08/2019 14:21

You weren't unreasonable at all.
What a stupid thing to try to do. What if Gary Glitter had seen her take it, got angry and taken or smashed your phone?
The group were probably feeling awkward and not wanting to create an even worse scene. I'd hope that this 'joker' learns from you before she does it again and ends up getting slapped or sued.

Yogurtcoveredricecake · 05/08/2019 14:44

People taking unsolicited photos are awful. How would they feel if someone took a photo of them because another person thought they looked funny/had odd hair/resembled a well known paedophile. It's like being an school all over again.

Good on you for standing your ground.

Coffeeandcherrypie · 05/08/2019 14:49

YANBU, they’re twats.

BishopofBathandWells · 05/08/2019 18:48

I had a massive falling out with a mate when I was pregnant about something similar. Hormones for sure, but I suddenly realised how fucking shitty it must feel to be just living your life and some absolute bellend turns you into a figure of fun.

plasterboots · 05/08/2019 23:04

Bloody silly bitch! HTH

plasterboots · 05/08/2019 23:05

Bloody silly bitch! HTH

That's her not you!

dollydaydream114 · 05/08/2019 23:32

Taking photos of people to laugh at them is absolutely vile and immature and you were absolutely right not to let someone use your phone for that purpose.

I have a friend who has caught people taking pics of her on their phones on more than one occasion because of her appearance. It is upsetting, humiliating and violating for her each time it happens. People who do this are total shits.

NoSauce · 06/08/2019 00:00

Some people are weird, why would you want a photo of a man that looked like GG?

You did the right thing OP.

HarrietSchulenberg · 06/08/2019 00:26

No, you were NBU. In fact, I'd have been tempted to take a picture of "friend" and plaster it all over her social media with the caption "Gary Glitter's biggest fan" to see if she liked it.

Candymay · 06/08/2019 00:36

Good on you. You had integrity no matter what anyone else felt about it.

chickenyhead · 06/08/2019 00:38

Nope. You are not the unreasonable one.

If she wants to do that with her phone it's none of your business. But it is your phone and the answer is no.

saraclara · 06/08/2019 00:46

Taking photos of people to mock them or shame them is an awful thing to do. I've pulled people up on it before, and no way would I accept them using my camera to do it.

AngelasAshes · 06/08/2019 00:51

YANBU
Taking photos of people in public without their knowledge is one of those legal but immoral things imho.

TwistyTop · 06/08/2019 05:50

They sound really bloody boring. If my mate said to me "look, that guy looks like Gary Glitter" I would have a glance and say "oh yeah, so he does". And then I'd move on with my life. It wouldn't enter my head to start getting excited and taking photos. They sound ridiculous and annoying.

LynetteScavo · 06/08/2019 05:55

Yanbu....immature and impolite behaviour from the woman in your group.

LynetteScavo · 06/08/2019 05:55

Yanbu....immature and impolite behaviour from the woman in your group.

flashdancer19 · 06/08/2019 08:21

Well I'm very glad I came on here to ask! It really pissed me off and she made that stupid loud woooooo noise that people do when they think you're being touchy about something.

Thanks all!

OP posts:
flashdancer19 · 06/08/2019 08:21

Well I'm very glad I came on here to ask! It really pissed me off and she made that stupid loud woooooo noise that people do when they think you're being touchy about something.

Thanks all!

OP posts:
flashdancer19 · 06/08/2019 08:21

Well I'm very glad I came on here to ask! It really pissed me off and she made that stupid loud woooooo noise that people do when they think you're being touchy about something.

Thanks all!

OP posts:
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