Rocky point-don’t know how to fix us

[Dinomom52]

Been with DP for 20 years.

2 kids. One with confirmed SEN one suspected. Life is massively hectic. We both work full time, never seem to find time to clean the house properly beyond the day to day of washing/pots etc.

We’ve had a bad patch recently & been arguing more & not communicating well. Nothing massively serious. Just day to day stuff. To be honest I think we’re both quite stressed & seeing issues where there aren’t any.

He wanted to have sex last night & started putting the moves on me. I shut him down - the thought of it was just not something I could do.

We’d had a good day. A nice night in. No arguments. A good day & I still couldn’t bring myself to sleep with him?

Can we fix this? If we can any advice? I feel like we’re broken?

You don’t have to always want sex. You are not broken.

Can you try tackling the house together?

The house isn’t too bad today to be honest. He does his share of housework, but seems unable to actually put anything away after he’s used it which gives me the rage. I went through a stage a couple of weeks ago where I actually hated him. Hormones did play a part in this.

I’ve probably explained things badly. I feel quite low this morning.

I just feel like we are broken as a couple. We don’t talk enough anymore. I don’t really feel that connection now. If we don’t have that i can’t see me ever wanting to have sex with him again. was hoping someone would have some advice on how to get it back?

I read something which said that a lot of men feel a connection THROUGH sex whilst women need to get the connection through talking/sharing experiences and having fun.

So it's a bit like a vicious circle. Tell him you need to have a laugh with him...and some fun before you want sex with him.

Yeah that sounds familiar I might have read something similar.

Don’t get me wrong, he was totally fine with not having sex. He’d never push, but he knows somethings. Or right.

Gonna have to have a talk about stuff I think