To create jobs I need a carpenter for?!

[simonneilsbeautifulhair]

Following on from the thread about the hot builder the other day......

I have an old acquaintance that's a carpenter- who it must be mentioned it super hot and I've always had a bit of a thing for. I'm single and not looking for a relationship but more a FWB situation.
From a previous conversation (and seeing his profile on OLD) I gather he is looking for the same, however we don't really bump into one another and I don't have the balls to just message him and lay my cards on the line.

I'm currently undergoing some small home improvements and thought it might be the ideal opportunity to orchestrate some work I need doing to spend some time together and hope that the spark does it's work 

Help me out Mumsnet - what might I need a carpenter to do in my house/garden?!

Build you an under stairs cupboard?

Built in bookshelves?

Shed/summerhouse construction?

Build cabinets, put up shelving, built fitted wardrobe, new kitchen doors ... The list is endless. Good luck.

Board out your loft space fnar fnar for storage??

Window shutters
Alcove cupboard/shelves

Can't help thinking that if a male wrote this, he would be called creepy.

'Theres a woman I'd really like to fuck. She is an accountant. Do you think I could ask her to come and look at my books so I can gauge whether she wants a shag'.

Damn my ikea habit for sorting most of these already

Build you a bed! Obviously! a good sturdy one. He’ll have to lie on it with you to test it.

You could pretend to live at my house...I need a carpenter.

I need my kitchen fitted, if I find a hot carpenter I might get it handmade 🤣

Shelves in one of the wardrobes.

Doors hung & framed

Do you need any of those? Or...

Built in bookshelves
Cupboard under the stairs
Built in coat/boot rack
Utility room shelving

...built in wardrobes...ideally close to a comfy looking bed...

Window shutters is genius!

PositiveVibes.

Not by me...and I’m an accountant.

How about you joy sponge elsewhere...

Sorry but that’s a bit creepy. If you want to screw him then just say so. Don’t invite him into your house under the pretences of wanting work done and then spend the whole time perching onnhim.

@PositiveVibez if the male wrote that the accountant was an old acquaintance of his who he had fancied for years then I don't think anyone would find it creepy.

If it was an accountant found online when searching for a bookkeeper, then perhaps.

IKEA schmea...hide it all in the garage! Or freecycle 🤣

If you insist on doing though send him over to mine to make some bookcases. We’re driving in boxes of books here. Will happily let you shag wherever you want in return.

It had occurred to me it would sound a bit creepy from the other perspective but we do have a history of consensual and mutual drunken flirting, however we both rarely go out now as we are old and boring 

I had my good looking colleague come and put up some shelves for me years ago and the afternoon ended in a very pleasurable way. There was something very sexy about seeing him getting handy with his drill (no pun intended!) Definitely go for it, bit of a cliche but what the hell!

Just say you have a few jobs - please bring your own wood.
But I actually agree with positivevibez - this whole thing is quite creepy and demeaning.

Sex room with built in chains ???

I'm not just trying to shag him as such- we get on really well. However we both had relationships end badly and enjoy our independence too much to get into one currently.

Dontgointothelonggrass i just spat my tea across the room 

Just message him! You don’t have to be as forward as “fancy a shag?” but I understand from OLD that women making a move is considered attractive.

I'm another one who thinks this is creepy. If a bloke did this to me, I would run for the hills. Just ask him for a drink instead of going down the weirdo route.

Why don’t you just match with him on OLD and take it from there?