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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

in being angry with dh for killing and poisoning?

59 replies

Spidermama · 03/05/2007 22:10

I found a dead rat curled up in the compost bin. When I told DH about it he admitted that he knew there were rats down there so he put poison down the hole he found under the compost bin to kill them.

I'm upset, but he's angry that I'm upset. You see he reckons I should be pleased and grateful that the big hunter/warrior (him) has protected me and the kids from the terrifying invader (rats). However now there's a rat's body in the compost and who knows how many more in their hole.

He says he'll dig them out and sort out the bottom of the compost bin so no more holes can be dug in it but my point is, why didn't he do this to begin with? Then they'd have gone away because their food supply was cut off, surely.

Now we have poison in our garden and compost as well as dead rats.

So. AIBU? Or what?

OP posts:
UCM · 03/05/2007 22:13

Would you have dealt with it if he hadn't. If you would have then, no you are not being ABu, but if you wouldn't then you are Cos I know for sure that I wouldn't fucking touch any of in a day of sundays if there was dead stuff. Yeuk

rowan1971 · 03/05/2007 22:13

Oh dear. Did he know that you would have objected to the poisoning technique? Was he being deliberately secretive in the hope you wouldn't find out, or was he just not thinking about what your response might be?

MrsJamesMartin · 03/05/2007 22:13

You can't really risk it with rats though you do need to kill them to get rid of them, once hes got rid of the bodies it will be ok.

PeachesMcLean · 03/05/2007 22:14

The best rats are dead ones.

The poison in the garden thing is another matter though. Can you clear it up?

Nightynight · 03/05/2007 22:15

It isn't that easy to get rid of rats, ime, they might not have gone just if you closed the compost hole (eg they might have access to your neighbours compost and choose to stay).
Its a bit odd that he had rat poison on the premises without telling you though. That would worry me slightly, I must admit. Does he often do things without consulting you?

PeachesMcLean · 03/05/2007 22:15

I mean, can DH clear it up sufficiently for you to be more relaxed about it?

powder28 · 03/05/2007 22:16

LOL @ 'once hes got rid of the bodies it will be ok'

Mrsjm, are you still talking about the rat?

Londonmamma · 03/05/2007 22:16

Oh Spidermama, I would have been SO grateful for a DH to deal with rats without my knowledge 'cos I hate them. Don't be too hard on him, please !

morningpaper · 03/05/2007 22:17

Hmm I think you are being unreasonable

He did you a favour as far as I can see

Yu can hardly look up the Pied Piper in the Yellow Pages

Original poster
Spidermama · 03/05/2007 22:17

rowan he was definitely being secretive because he knew I'd object.

UCM good point, but the compost is definitely his project. However if he's poisoning the garden my kids play in then I think I should perhaps be consulted? No?

See, MrsJ once he has got rid of the bodies he'lkl need to secure the compost bin to make sure more don't come. So if he had done this in the first place it would have negated the need for poison.

I must admit to being a bit upset to see a tiny furry body all curled up in the compost. Also I think it's a pretty nasty way to go isn't it?

Maybe I'm just being a dippy hippy.

OP posts:
galaxy · 03/05/2007 22:17

I would do the poisoning myself - we had rats last year in tge garden - cost us £60 to get rid and I think they're back again too

whomovedmychocolate · 03/05/2007 22:18

I'd be annoyed too - esp. if you have pets as well as kids. Kids you can tell to be careful, pets you can't.

Find out what poison he used and call the council, they will properly eradicate them for about £30 (or free in some areas) and advise you how to clear up any remaining poison.

edam · 03/05/2007 22:18

Um, in practical terms I'd be FURIOUS about having rat poison around without you knowing, given you have children. Dh did this to me when ds was small. I only found out about it when ds found the poison. Thank f*ck he was OK but dh wasn't, when I got hold of him.

Fortunately the National Poisons Unit told us via NHS Direct you need more than a grain or two of warfarin to seriously harm a toddler. But it's not something anyone should muck about with.

lucy5 · 03/05/2007 22:20

Eeeew, hey are horrible things. We had a palm rat move in when we were renovating the kitchen. it was living under the new units, yuck. Dh poisoned it and I was very happy.

I get your point about the food supply though, ours was living on the dog biscuits.

mateychops · 03/05/2007 22:20

What did you want him to do with the rats? What were your options? Get a grip, girl.
So, yes, IMO you are being unreasonable.

Blu · 03/05/2007 22:20

Having had rats in a previous house, I would say that no, the rats would not have happily toddled off elsewhere when their food supply was cut off - they would determindly find their way to the next easies nearby supply - in your cupboards via an airbrick, drain hole, or actually through the back door when you have it open in summer.

The ones in my house got into the foundations and then gnawed their way into my cupboard through some damp-proofing sealant stuff. They gnawed runs through the whole place very quickly, making entrances and exits. One morning I came into my kitchen to see a rat eating an apple in the fruit bowl.

They urinate constantly wherever they go because they have no sphincters - and spread diseases that way.

No warrior to spread a bit of poison, but, I think the best way.

You really don't want what I had to deal with.

NB to any MN-ers who have been to my house: it was a house before I was a MN-er!

Original poster
Spidermama · 03/05/2007 22:21

I suppose that's our lovely green organic compost fucked then. Months of top quality potato peelings now all steeped in warfarin. Not much good for the rhubarb.

OP posts:
morningpaper · 03/05/2007 22:22

WEeeeeeeeeeeeell it's never as good as John Innes is it?

Original poster
Spidermama · 03/05/2007 22:23

What are the chances the neighbour's cats will eat the rats and die?

OP posts:
Blu · 03/05/2007 22:23

The poison isn't scattered freely about the garden, is it?

mateychops · 03/05/2007 22:25

What were the chances that the rats had already crapped over your top organic matter?

Londonmamma · 03/05/2007 22:27

Blu - I would have DIED had that happened to me OMG

Original poster
Spidermama · 03/05/2007 22:30

Blu I also had rat horror in Brixton. They came from below and chewed through iron pipes to get to me. Like a horror film.

Mateychops I certainly wouldn't miss the cat poo if the neighbours pets were to take ill (mwah ha) but I like the neighbours so I am a little scared.

OP posts:
mateychops · 03/05/2007 22:32

Invite them round for rhubarb crumble.

edam · 03/05/2007 22:32

Oh f*ck I hope those cats are OK, Spider, having had my beloved cat put down today I'd wring your dh's bloody neck if he's risked the lives of any other pets.