To correct Nursery

[TheDaysOfYore]

My DS is 3 and goes to Nursery where the kids are currently learning to spell their own names...

My DS has a long name on his birth certificate that we shorten in every day use... think along the lines of Johnathon - John or Anthony - Ant.

We very rarely use his full name and the only reason we gave him the full name on his birth certificate is so he has options when he’s older for a more professional sounding name if he wanted.

Nursery are insisting on calling him by his full name all the time because they are learning to spell their names.

He does know that his name is the full version and that we call him by the short one.

Wibu to insist they use the shorter version and just use the longer version when they are actually sitting and writing their names?

(Sorry it’s a bit long winded!)

YANBU. They're needlessly confusing him. Not really anything else to add!

Can't he just learn to write the short version? If that's the name he uses, he won't need to write the full name unless he wants to open a bank account!

I was one of those long name never used children, it create unnecessary confusion for years, still does occasionally. I've made sure that pet names are only used at home and our son learns his full name at nursery as his name that non-family use.

We very rarely use his full name and the only reason we gave him the full name on his birth certificate is so he has options when he’s older for a more professional sounding name if he wanted.

This makes no sense at all.

Makes perfect sense to me!
Katherine / Katie
Elizabeth / Lizzie
Sebastian / Seb
Alexander / Alex

Definitely tell nursery the name you call him. Their fixation on his full name is ridiculous. I find it hard to believe your child is the only one in this situation in the class too.

We had a 'known as' name which was used on coat hooks and pictures

Personally I think it's stupid, why give him a name you refuse to let people use.

Was there not a "known as" box on his registration? What's on his peg, tray, contact book and so on?

Definitely correct them firmly and insist it is used for everything.

YANBU.

Our daughter is always called by her "short" name (a contraction of "Katherine"). We wanted her to have plenty of options when she's older.

Our son, likewise, has a (very common) short form of a (very common) longer name.

Surely this is a perfectly normal thing and has been for generations? My parents (in their 60s) have ALWAYS been called by the short form of their names (by everyone except their own parents ;-)) I go by a short form of my name, and so do my two siblings.

All staff at all settings have been fine with using my daughter and son's "short" names, including when learning to write.

I can't see the point in making a child write a longer, more complex name if they go by a shorter version.

Our sons both have full formal names but use shortened versions in real life - think John / Jonathon - in both cases nursery and now school use the everyday one and that's what they learnt to write.
They have a middle name too but I don't expect that to be used or learnt early on either.
As they got older they learnt the whole lot but to start off easier is better in both the case of understanding and spelling.

Dd is Eloise only on her passport and birth certificate. She hates it so from reception onwards has been reffered to as Ellie at school and Elle to relatives including us.

It baffles me why anybody would name a child but not want that name used

It's either his name or it isn't

Meant to say its never been an issue for primary or high school

It baffles me why anybody would name a child but not want that name used

Me too, if I'm honest, but that not the question, is it?

OP has made a commonplace naming decision and she wants advice on enforcing it not our approval of her original choice.

Ds is Alexander but he's known as Alex hes been at the school since nursery and its never been an issue hes in yr 6 now.

Thanks everyone. They did have a ‘known as’ box on his registration form and in daycare (at the same place) they didn’t have any issue with it, it’s only now he’s in F1 and they are writing.

I think I will reinforce they have to say his short name as he does know his full name and he will learn to spell it but he also has 2 long middle names and a long surname and he’s not expected to learn those now is he but he will learn them eventually.

Not unreasonable. My 4 year old has a long name but is only ever called by her nickname by everyone else. We occasionally use her full name. Nursery and school taught her to write her nickname without us asking.

Yanbu

I work in a nursery and have a handful of children with long names but their parents use shortened versions for them e.g. Cassie/Cassandra. On their name pegs, with name writing etc we use the long names...i wouldn't have a problem if a parent requested we use shorter version though.

DS is called by a shortened version of his name at home, we picked his name because we liked the short version.

At school he's called by the full version and has learnt to write it. He seems fine and not at all confused.

A friend of mine did this and discovered the hard way that schools, doctors, official stuff etc will always use his full name.

If you want him to be known by the shortened version then you need to register that as his name with the school and wherever else you want it used.

We did this with DD2 as well. We were trying to take account of the fact that the cute baby/toddler/little girl you're thinking about when you're pregnant is, all going well, going to one day be a 45 year old woman with a serious job. We tried out all our options by putting "detective chief inspector" in front of them to see if they sounded stupid!

*It baffles me why anybody would name a child but not want that name used

It's either his name or it isn't*

This ^

It baffles me why anybody would name a child but not want that name used. It's either his name or it isn't

Of course Prince Harry is really a Prince Henry.

My youngest has always been known by the shortened version of his name. When he started school the reception teacher spoke to me to check whether we wanted him to learn to spell his full name or his shortened version, we went with the shortened version as it's what he knew best.

It's not like he never learned to spell the full version.

Never had a problem with teachers using it either. Supply teachers say what's on the register but he (or other kids) will tell them his preferred name.

People have been shortening names since forever - I'm known by my shortened name by everyone and it's never affected me in any way. So is ex-h, and his brother and sister. All very common names with common shortening. (Think Dave, Pete, Sam etc)