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Original poster

Paying your child to do chores?

35 replies

user1498912461 · 08/11/2017 08:34

Paying your child to do chores? Should they be expected to do chores anyway or is it acceptable to pay a small amount for them to do a selection of chores so they can learn the value of money/save for items they want etc? Looking for opinions!

OP posts:
AllRoadsLeadBackToRadley · 08/11/2017 08:41

My two do chores to earn their allowance each week.

JacquesHammer · 08/11/2017 08:42

I don't believe in paying children to do jobs.

As far as I am concerned jobs around the house are just something you do as part of a family.

PanGalaticGargleBlaster · 08/11/2017 08:43

I did chores for my pocket money, washing the car, cutting the grass, shopping, feeding and waking the dog etc

elQuintoConyo · 08/11/2017 08:46

Big stuff like washing the car, yes. Anything else, no. Why would i pay my 6yo to tidy his toys or run a wet wipe over his playtable?

He loves wetwiping the skirting board Grin i'm not paying for that!

Bizzysocks · 08/11/2017 08:48

No chores no pocket money

Crumbs1 · 08/11/2017 08:50

MIne were expected to join in with everyday chores - dishwasher, hoovering, laundry etc but from about 10 could earn additional money sometimes for bigger jobs. I get paid to work and I think it’s a good message to give. It was things like valeting the cars, babysitting (not from 10 obviously), preparation and serving at supper parties or drinks parties, helping with shed clearance and tip runs, Spring cleaning.

ShatnersWig · 08/11/2017 08:59

I never had any set chores at home, but I was expected to keep my room tidy and wash up my cups, plates but not my parents'. I had a small amount of pocket money (and I do mean small) until I was 13 when I had a Saturday job so if I wanted something I had to save and buy it myself. In those days you could buy things from catalogues and pay it off each week (it cost you more overall of course). I was taught how to cook for myself and often did.

When I was an adult I once asked my parents why I never had chores as such. I was quite surprised by their answer. "We didn't have a child to be a skivvy for us; now you have your own home, you'll be doing all the work there yourself. You worked hard at school, did homework when you came in, worked on Saturdays, that was enough."

Dad was a builder and I'd often go and help him out on things by choice.

MilkTwoSugarsThanks · 08/11/2017 09:09

Tbh i don't like paying DS for chores (no-one pays me!) but I don't see any other way of him being able to earn money and I don't want to just give him pocket money.

I do think it's important that he learns about earning money and to save up for things that he wants himself.

Davegrohlsgirl · 08/11/2017 09:16

I pay mine for jobs around the house.
We use a system of lolly sticks with the chores written on them and the amount they get for that job. They then get paid on Saturdays for the jobs they've done that week.
I have found it quite motivational for them as they compare what they've earnt each week with each other.
Currently my DD is paying off a debt to me (amazon prime related) and so she wants to pay it off as quickly as possible so she can get some actual cash!
DS on the other hand is saving for a Nintendo switch which I have refused to buy for him.

SloeSloeQuickQuickGin · 08/11/2017 09:16

Chores are how you learn to run you own home. Or not, as the case may be. How many ridiculous threads do we get daily about

(a) what to cook for tea; I've got a tin of baked beans, some shoe polish and a squirt of lavender oil, what can I cook for tea with that… or worse, I’m going to Adli for the first time, tell me what to buy
(b) how do I do this fundamentally simple task like change a light bulb
(c) Which leg should I put out bed first this morning?
and my particular favourite
(d) how do I budget, how do we apportion spends

Frankly if people had chores and pocket money growing up and were used to the concept of saving, spending responsibly, and shopping we might not be such a bubble wrapped nanny stated culture.

TheNotSoGoodWife · 08/11/2017 09:18

Mine get pocket money and they do chores.

The 2 are not linked BUT dc2 is trying to save to goon a big tripod he does get ‘paid’ for doing things that are not in the normal chore list, eg babysitting the younger siblings and gardening jobs.

kuniloofdooksa · 08/11/2017 09:21

It's important to me to be clear that pocket money is not wages for chores.

From each according to their ability, to each according to their need. In a family, all the work is shared as much as possible with everyone pulling their weight, and everyone gets personal spending money. Paying for chores might kick in if a DC wanted to do more than their fair share of the chores in order to accrue more money for a particular thing they are saving for, but such a phenomenon has not happened yet.

JaceLancs · 08/11/2017 09:28

My DC got pocket money which with a bit of flexibility was conditional on them keeping their own rooms tidy, putting away washing etc and taking turns to wash up (probably from age 7-11)
From 11 they had to do own ironing make lunches and help with cooking and general tidiness
From 14-18 when they left for university I paid them at market rates to do all my cleaning - they still got an allowance on top
My house was spotless and I really miss that
More important they are quite capable of doing everything necessary including cooking budgeting meal planning etc now they are in their early 20s

RafikiIsTheBest · 08/11/2017 09:29

My parents flittered back and forth between we pay you to do well at school and you haven't done x, y and z around the house so no money...

I don't have any yet but would like to tell my future kid/s (if I can have any) that they get money for doing well at school, based on any issues we are contacted about and parents evenings, reports etc. But household chores are something we all do so we have a lovely home and can use it to relax in. I.e. do x, y or z otherwise no electronics etc.

JaceLancs · 08/11/2017 09:33

I believe learning to save and gaining a good work ethic start quite young - as a lone parent I couldn’t afford to give them as much as many of their peers
Both DC had part time jobs from 16 which they carried on at university, they were able to afford to pay for own driving lessons and buy, tax and insure their cars from 17
DD used to spend the rest on going out, beauty products and clothes
DS spent more on games and tech

HappyLandFan · 08/11/2017 09:41

I would give a basic pocket money regardless, that can be increased by doing some chores.
Tidying up after themselves should be part and parcel (haha) but things like washing/drying up could generate a small amount to supplement their pocket money.

didyouseethesunwasred · 08/11/2017 09:47

Mine gets her pocket money regardless.
She helps round the house and can earn treats for extra jobs via chore monster.
So she can earn extra tv time, can of coke, baking etc by doing additional jobs for points

Katedotness1963 · 08/11/2017 09:53

They do chores. They get pocket money. The two are not linked. We all keep the house clean, because we all live in it and dirty it. Everyone has to learn how to clean and tidy.

RedBunny · 08/11/2017 09:53

My husband is terrible for what I think of as “bribing” the children. Grin
I expect them to just help in general as they get older as in tidy up after themselves, get the table ready for dinner, etc, (my eldest is 5 so not loads she can do yet but some things) and then anything extra or big can be to earn pocket money or treats. We shall see how it pans out as they get older!!

AllRoadsLeadBackToRadley · 08/11/2017 10:03

I did pay the DC a fiver to sort my sock drawer during half term.

Full sized drawer.
87 pairs of socks.
None in pairs.
😅

RedSkyAtNight · 08/11/2017 10:11

The DC have a certain number of jobs they are expected to do as part of being a member of the family.

We might pay them for one off, exceptional jobs (gardening, and clearing out the garage come to mind).

BertrandRussell · 08/11/2017 10:13

I think pocket money should be entirely separate from doing chores.

Chores are part of the business of living in a family. They aren't paid work.

AlexsMum89 · 08/11/2017 10:51

I don't think there's one right answer. I currently operate a reward system with my 7yo where he does chores to get stickers which add up to whatever it is he's after (within reason) but I do get him to tidy his toys with no reward other than making me happy haha.

Flokidoki · 08/11/2017 10:58

DD gets weekly pocket money.

However, she also has what we call a 'busy book' and I'll write down a small to do list for her. For instance, 'put teddies away' and it will have a nominal 2p or something attached to it. it's not because she wouldn't do these things if asked but added a sense of fun and responsibility to some tasks. Over time lots of the things that were always on it she now does without thinking anyway.

But in general, no I wouldn't be telling her that her pocket money was dependent on whether she made her bed or not.

Dahlietta · 08/11/2017 11:03

They do chores. They get pocket money. The two are not linked

This. Although in addition, DS does not get his pocket money if he's been a pain in the arse - this might include refusing to help with things he's been asked to do!