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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To worry about how children behave these days

26 replies

winterwinter · 15/10/2017 15:40

Just read a very upsetting article in my local newspaper about a group of children who set a squirrel on fire and videod it on snap chat, they were all roaring with laughter in the back ground.

Is it just me or does it seem more and more often these days children are committing these types of crime? I honestly think we have a problem these days whereby parents are afraid to discipline their children properly and don’t enforce proper moral values. I may be slated for this but whenever I go out these days children’s behaviour seems appalling- screaming and shouting, being rude to other people. I wouldn’t have dared misbehave in such a way when I was younger.

OP posts:
KurriKurri · 15/10/2017 15:52

There have always been disturbed children who commit acts of cruelty, and there have alays been children who behve badly. It's not new -just more widely reported.

I think it is unfair to lump all children together and say they are awful, most of the evidence is anecdotal.
I was in the Guildhall gallery the other day looking at the Roman Amphithteatre remains - a group of maybe 20 school children about 9yrs old were on a trip there. They sat quietly, listened to the man from the gallery telling them about it, answered all his questions with great enthusiasm, and asked lots ofgreat questions when it was their turn. All put their hands up to ask, none of them were shouting out.
They all lined up sensibly when it was time to move on to the next part of the tour. Ordinary state school kids. They were a complete delight.

I'm sure someone can give anecdote about badly behaved kids, buut i see at least equal numbers if not far more charming children when I am out and about.

queenthequeen · 15/10/2017 15:53

It isn't anything new at all. Probably more
common fifty years ago, in fact.

RavingRoo · 15/10/2017 15:55

Stuff like this always used to happen. Friend’s gran used to talk about how young boys would often pull the wings off butterflies or birds and laugh as they died, and that was in the thirties. Nothing fundamental has changed; the only difference is that now we know it’s not horsing around but the sign of worse to come.

Pansiesandredrosesandmarigolds · 15/10/2017 15:58

'Boys throws stones at frogs in sport, but the frogs die in earnest' is a quote from about 300 BCE, so....

Hercules12 · 15/10/2017 15:58

I believe Socrates said something very similar.

Pansiesandredrosesandmarigolds · 15/10/2017 15:59

As for it being a sign of worse to come... Maybe.

Ttbb · 15/10/2017 16:00

This kind d of stuff has been happening for centuries just like kidnapping and rapes. It just seems more common because it is more widely reported.

pointythings · 15/10/2017 16:02

I don't see it. The majority of children and teens I come into contact with are lovely - and I live almost on the doorstep of a large comprehensive. There have always been disturbed kids who do awful things - adults too. Because the media is everywhere, we hear about it more.

Remove the nostalgia-tinted spectacles, OP...

Pansiesandredrosesandmarigolds · 15/10/2017 16:03

It's an interesting one - violent crime has been falling for decades, but we feel less unsafe. Suspect it's similar with children's behaviour.

mrssunshinexxx · 15/10/2017 16:12

It's fucking awful. The same should be bloody done to them. Cannot STAND animal cruelty. Disgusting humans

ErrolTheDragon · 15/10/2017 16:22

Every generation seems to feel like this about the next one.

For instance Hesiod (8th century BCE) rickriordan.com/2011/05/some-things-never-change/

Cruelty to animals is of course horrible, but its nothing new.

harlandgoddard · 15/10/2017 16:23

That’s horrible Sad but I don’t think it’s anything new, just that snapchat wouldn’t have been around years ago. People aren’t born compassionate IMO, I think it’s mostly learned.

You can’t really put misbehaving and setting an animal on fire for a laugh in the same category.

When you say you wouldn’t have dared misbehave do you mean at all or just in public/in front of your parents? My dad talks about how kids don’t respect their parents anymore but I don’t think he ever really respected his father, he just would have been scared to step out of line with him.

BeyondThePage · 15/10/2017 16:24

my facebook has a pic of 2 elderly ladies setting their whippets on squirrels in the park - so it's not just the kids!

frogsoup · 15/10/2017 16:28

You know people have been saying variations on this theme for literally milleniae?!!! The ancient Greeks were worrying about the bad behaviour of the yoof! In 200 years people will still be saying it. What makes you think the generation just after you is uniquely special?! It isn't, and you aren't either. Really, it's called you getting old and moaning about youth today, like every new generation since the dawn of time. sorry!

Mittens1969 · 15/10/2017 16:31

Definitely not new, remember the book ‘Lord of the Flies’? I would agree that if anything it was worse back then. It’s just that children have the means of recording their actions on video.

EB123 · 15/10/2017 16:38

That sounds awful. As others have said I don't think it is a new thing just we find out about this stuff now whereas 50 years ago there was no social media.

There is a massive difference between children playing up and setting animals on fire.

Original poster
winterwinter · 15/10/2017 17:29

I understand that they are two completely different things, but the principle of not knowing how to behave is the same thing. Perhaps it’s just where I live but I can’t remember the last time I was in a public area and didn’t witness countless children misbehaving terribly and their parents doing absolutely nothing about it. I was at the hospital a week ago and there were children jumping up and down on the seats which cause the whole row to shake- parents turned a blind eye.

I understand it may be a generational thing though. Perhaps I am just a lot less tolerant than I like to think!!

OP posts:
TheMotherOfAllBeeches · 15/10/2017 17:43
Biscuit
pointythings · 15/10/2017 19:52

I'd like a definition of 'countless children' and of 'misbehaving terribly' because you sound a bit pearl-clutchy and curtain-twitchy now, OP...

allthegoodusernameshavegone · 15/10/2017 19:56

There is more media attention now that's the difference.

BeyondThePage · 16/10/2017 07:07

my kids behave impeccably.

So, anecdotally, from a pool of 2, kids today are marvellous.

speakout · 16/10/2017 07:13

Nothing new OP.

By discipline I assume you mean punishment?

I don't punish my children. Works just fine for us.

NoMoreRoomOnTheBroom · 16/10/2017 07:18

I was at the hospital a week ago and there were children jumping up and down on the seats which cause the whole row to shake- parents turned a blind eye.

If they had told them off, would you have then commented on how the parents "disciplined" or "punished" their children in public for everyone to see??

Do you have children (or grandchildren) OP?

ethelfleda · 16/10/2017 07:39

I really wish I hadn't read that.

Dingdongdigeridoo · 16/10/2017 08:47

When I was at school a girl put her sister’s hamster in the microwave. Nowadays, it’d probably be all over snapchat and get on the news.

So yes, it’s terrible. But sadly it’s nothing new. If anything, animal cruelty is less socially acceptable now.