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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask for a handhold please

17 replies

JaceLancs · 03/10/2017 23:17

Just waiting for a phone call to hear how my Dad is
He is 91 with quite a few health problems and was bluelighted into hospital tonight after a tummy bug has caused a problem with fairly recent heart surgery
DB and SIL are there supporting DM who has early stages dementia so he's not alone - just feel so helpless
I could get there tomorrow but just feeling very alone tonight

OP posts:
TeddyBoy14 · 03/10/2017 23:26

More than happy to hold your hand.

Have you got anyone with YOU, to lean on for support, or to just make you a cup of tea whilst you wait to hear of news? I really hope you do. Not nice to think you may be waiting anxiously alone.

Hear if you want to chat or just offload Flowers and I shall be willing your Dad to pull through xx

BlueSuffragette · 03/10/2017 23:33

So sorryFlowers sometimes you really feel helpless. Hope your dad is ok. Good to hear your mum has support. Just try and be positive and remember all the lovely times you've had with your dad and send him positive vibes. Sending you my best wishes and of course to your dad too.

Original poster
JaceLancs · 03/10/2017 23:35

Thank you TeddyBoy - DS 24 is here - although he has gone to bed - no point in us both being wrecked for work in morning
I won't go in to work unless I hear that he's stable and will get away as early as I can to go n visit
DD keeps messaging me and is coming over first thing to offer tlc

OP posts:
Original poster
JaceLancs · 03/10/2017 23:38

Thank you BlueS obviously I'm biased but he is a very special gentleman who is also a very gentle man and is my greatest role model

OP posts:
TeddyBoy14 · 03/10/2017 23:44

So glad you've got your son there too. If you don't feel up to going into work tomorrow (and who'd blame you?) are you able to call in sick?

It's an immensely worrying time for you and I'm sure they'll understand 😘.

I just think that that pressure of "got to be up in x amount of hours to go to work" is probably one you could do without right now.

That's wonderful your daughter will be over in the morning.

In the meantime, try (if you can) to get some rest, you must be feeling drained with the worry xx.

Xmasfairy86 · 03/10/2017 23:58

Oh jace that sucks. Don’t know how long I’ll last but I’m here to listen!

Ladybirdbookworm · 03/10/2017 23:58

Just wanted you to know I'm thinking of you - try and have a lie down even if you can't sleep Flowers

LoyaltyAndLobster · 04/10/2017 00:07
Flowers

He will be ok OP he is in good hands, try and get some sleep he wouldn’t want you to be awake worrying.

Original poster
JaceLancs · 04/10/2017 01:11

Thank you everyone - I dozed off in front of tv - no news is just well no news really.....
Which I'm actually taking as a good sign - DB has said he will message me so I'm going to bed with phone on pillow - hopefully I will see Dad tomorrow and let DB grab some rest
I will go to work if possible as I hate letting people down and am booked to do something tomorrow for work including train tickets paid for etc
Thanks again the handhold was lovely

OP posts:
Original poster
JaceLancs · 04/10/2017 07:31

Just to update Dad is doing ok - had X-rays and bloods done etc - improved enough to be discharged home first thing this morning with an urgent referral to his heart specialist at a neighbouring hospital
I'm hoping to visit later but wary because I've started with a dreadful sniffle this morning so will telephone first and see what DM thinks - won't go if I think I may risk passing it on

OP posts:
LoyaltyAndLobster · 04/10/2017 07:57

Morning OP so happy to hear he is ok, I knew he would be Flowers

TeddyBoy14 · 04/10/2017 09:03

Oh that is really the best news, it's made my morning.

Urgent heart referrals are usually really quick (I was referred urgently and seen within the week) so that's encouraging.

Can't tell you how delighted I am that he's being discharged.

He sounds like a strong and wonderful Gentleman. You must be very proud of him.

Still thinking of you and please do update us Flowers xxx.

DO3271 · 04/10/2017 09:46

Pleased to hear your Dad is doing OK. Hopefully he keeps improving and you keep getting positive news x Flowers

Original poster
JaceLancs · 04/10/2017 11:28

Thank you will update later as I hear anything x

OP posts:
TeddyBoy14 · 04/10/2017 23:18

Any news JaceLancs? Hope all continues to be well and everything went smoothly with your Dad's discharge Flowers xx

Original poster
JaceLancs · 05/10/2017 00:59

All well so far
Dad has spent the day at home resting
Sadly DM is a tad confused but am hopeful that she is coping n keeping him hydrated
I can't visit due to cold etc but will call them again tomorrow n monitor situation
I've asked DM to ring consultant Heart specialist secretary to expedite referral as don't want it to get lost in our lovely NHS

OP posts:
TeddyBoy14 · 06/10/2017 15:28

Is there anyone who can help them out a bit? If your DM is a tad confused herself, I'd be worried about her ability to look after your DF and, as you say, keep him hydrated, or chase up cardiac consultant appointments.

Just worried she might not be able to cope that well and the situation might have added to the stress/agitation.

Still keeping you all in my thoughts xx.

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