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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think my mil needs to get real

9 replies

2shoesonanegghunt · 01/04/2007 22:06

dh's cousens daughter died last week after a long ilness. she was in her early 40's married with 2 children.
they live in canada.
mil is doing my head in ok i understand she is feeling sad and because she can't go to funeral she has no chance of saying goodbye. but omg she does go on. I think her and her 2 sisters are just winding each other up.
she just phoned moaning as I was the only one who got an email saying what day the funeral was.......um because I had sent one!!
also having a good old moan about how the mum and dad should be phoning the aunts and keeping them informed.
I did say "well they are probally in pieces"
oh she says well we have to cope when it happens to us felt like asking her when she had lost a child!
to me these people have lost their only child. even when that said person is 40 it is still their child.
I know My mil is 81 but a bit of compassion wouldn't go amis.
rant over

OP posts:
CadburyCremeSquonk · 01/04/2007 22:08

She's being an old woman.

Think happy happy thoughts

fransmom · 01/04/2007 22:08

that's a difficult one. she probably has a lot of regrets about not being there for one of her relatives. please don't take this the wrong way but maybe you could also do with a bit of compassion? x

doormat · 01/04/2007 22:09

tell her to wind her neck in

2shoesonanegghunt · 01/04/2007 22:10

oh I have compassion that is why I posted here rather than shouting at her. I do feel for her and know that she is sad. but it is the lets run them all down bit that gets to me.

OP posts:
fireflyfairy2 · 01/04/2007 22:13

If they lived in Canada, did she really have that much to do with the woman on a daily basis?

Some old people like to make things worse, add a bit of drama to their day, that otherwise would consist of opening a tin of creamed rice & a boil in the bag cod.

2shoesonanegghunt · 01/04/2007 22:17

ffs now bil is ringing about the email i got from the mum

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RedLorryYellowLorry · 01/04/2007 22:22

She wants to feel needed and involved I suppose. Just turn your ears off and make the appropriate noises while writing a shopping list or something useful. I use this technique with Saint Marion of Aberdeen more commonly known as my MIL .

2shoesonanegghunt · 01/04/2007 22:28

tell you one thing I am NEVER telling them agoain when I get a private email

OP posts:
2shoesonanegghunt · 01/04/2007 23:21

thankfully bil has sorted it and I think she will now phone canada tomorrow. oh bless her

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