To commit assault with my mind

[LizzieVereker]

The man opposite me on the train is doing VERY noisy yawns. Repeatedly. He keeps staring at me, I think to get me to look up and chat. WIBU to assault him
by giving him a death stare full of my hateful thoughts?

What would make you want to hurt someone with your death stare?

Disclaimer: I'm not normally this mean but have just had a scary MRI scan and want to sit quietly. But to be fair, noisy yawners always make me FURIOUS.

Pop your finger In his mouth and stroke his younger next time he yawns. He will never yawn afain

He doesn't have anyone younger with him But I might try it anyway. I'm starting to wonder if he's had a few pints.

STOP STARING AT ME, MAN

Put your finger in his mouth and say "yawn rape" then wonder off giggling,

I think she meant tongue. That would definitely stop him, might leave you open to some awkward questions.

I settle for a reeves and mortimer style giant frying pan. Size of pan according to how annoying they are being.

Yes tongue... don't stroke youngers.